Greetings. My name is Maurice Sarns. This is the text only and hopefully speech friendly version of my homepage. I am not entirely sure if this page has any content at this time that will be useful to the visually impaired, but its not my place to circumscribe any one else's interests.
Currently, this homepage is fairly low on content, I am working on developing
my web skills and laying out the skeleton of an online journal. My intention is to gradually fill this site with mildly interesting information on my family, my observations on practical but fun cookery, and my comments on my specialty of desktop publishing. Right now I have mainly developed the parts about my family. My cooking section is empty and my section on desktop publishing only contains my resume and a sample portfolio of my professional work. The text and speech friendly version is now only this page. I'll get more parallel links up as I get the chance.
I am going to include all the images used on the original pages, placed on separate lines. I will try to use the alt equals call to indicate whether these are active links. I will also use all original text, with possibly a bit more information added in where the high graphics pages may have been vague.
I have not set my computer up for speech interpretations of web pages. I will be working on the recommendations I have found about creating speech-friendly pages. I will check the pages with "Lynxit!", to check how it looks on text only readers. If you have any comments on the compatibility of my text section with text readers or speech interpreters, please let me know at the following email address:
As a graphic artist, I will freely admit that I am highly visually dependent and probably a visual chauvanist. Be gentle with your comments and I will do my best to learn.
In fact, here is a case in point. I intend to display the link to this page with a line of text at the top of the page that is adjusted to match the background color of my primary homepage, rendering the text invisible. I will then also use a small graphic to indicate the link to this page. This way speech browers will get the link immediately, graphic browsers will have an unobtrusive indication of the link, and text browsers will get both the text link and alt equals description. I consider this an elegant solution, however it may appear to be a "back of the bus" mentality, what do you think?
Hi, this is my homepage. I am designing this with the intention of creating an idiosyncratic, but hopefully interesting personal journal for public consumption. If you're interested in employing me, take a look at my resume and portfolio. If you're not interested by this, hit backup. If you're really not interested you can read my mission statement/construction note later on.
This is a link to my mission statement and construction notes.
My Mechanical Ancestors
It's entirely possible that you live near a Sarns Machine Shop. It's not a chain, just a habit. On my father's side of the family, machine work is part of a long tradition. Here's a little background on of one of the earliest Sarns Machine Shops, started by my Grandfather Maurice Augustus Sarns.
This is a link to the page on my grandfathers machine shop in Mount Clemens, Michigan.
This is a link to information on my other relatives running machine shops.
Women Who Cross-Train with Wolves
My sister Kathy lives in Alaska, works as a graphics artist, skis 200 miles at a time for fun, and is running out of squeaky toys for her two wolves.
This links to the page on my sister Kathy
He's a Nice Kid in the Long Run, But Who Likes Long, Runny Kids?
My brother Tommy is another computer gearhead, currently living it up in the bright lights of Tampa. He hasn't sent me much personala info on his life lately. So, here's what I have so far.
This links to the page on my brother Tommy.
Yes Mom...
My mother watches the news, so she knows that the Internet is seething with weirdos, stalkers, and people with bad haircuts. I have therefor been prohibited from giving any information about her on my page. In lieu of that I decided to post a pic of her fiercesome, vicious, really nasty guard dogs.
Spam, Mead, and Glory
Beware of short Scandinavians with a business plan. Through no fault of my own, I've become a corporate mascot. The following is the terrible (terribly violent) story of how I became Olaf, official spokesviking for Screaming Viking Mead and the strange and twisted story of twelve-step-plan for world domination.
This links to my story of Screaming Viking Mead
This links to Fred Buhl's homepage To Serve Mo
I live in Gainesville, so I have of course spent a lot of time in the non-chain food industry. This area will gradually be filled with my personal ravings on practical and effective
This is my totally underdeveloped page on cooking. Mo Need's Work!
Yeah I'm looking for a job right now. So, for the present this will be just my resume. Or just send me some cash. ;) Later I hope to include some sort of rantings on my specialty, which is desktop publishing.
This links to the page on my mom.
This lead to my resume and then my sample portfolio.
Here are a few of my favorite spots in Gainesville
This links to a page of my favorite spots in Gainesville.
In 1995, Money Magazine named Gainesville (Hogtown) as the best place to live in America. Can anyone explain why?
This links to my page on Gainesville
Oh man, the CDA is on the ropes, so the next great idea is "harm to minors." Since I can't resist temptation, here is something guaranteed to cause harm to minors.
Tired of the same old personal homepage? Here's my apology and mission statement.
This links to my apology and mission statement
Maurice Sarns, AFN29467@AFN.ORG
