IV.201
definitely a Greenaway film. :)
taking some liberties with my character there, Mr. Clarke?
User: Graham prefers such liberties in person, but virtual will do :)
Date: 12-Jan 03:28 AM 821417399
IV.202
I like it Max. Thanx.
User: VISION
Date: 12-Jan 09:22 AM 821438530
IV.203
Graham: yeah, I admit I did. Chalk it up to the strange scent in the air...
After this Graham and Traveler (in the VVC world) can go back to being "just
friends." :)
Vision: you're welcome. :)
User: Traveler
Date: 13-Jan 05:22 PM 821553772
IV.204
GRAHAM reads TRAVELER's mail message to the "just friends" part and
then logs off. She puts on a low-cut green velvet shirt and lots of red
lipstick, before running off to find Traveler.
She finds him sitting, alone, in the Red Room, writinng in his journal.
"Writing about me again?" she says, winking at him.
"Oh...hi...," Traveler says, "Did you, uh, get my mail?"
Graham pretends to notice a bit of lint on her sleeve, and brushes her
arm. Traveler closes his journal. "So did you read my mail?" he says, again.
"I'm really sorry about what happened. I'll make sure it doesn't happen
again."
"May I sit down?" Graham says.
"Of course."
Moving closer to him, she touches his face, and then sits on his lap.
She bites his earlobe, softly, and then whispers, "Are you *sure* it won't
happen again? .... Because I'm not."
User: GRAHAM
Date: 14-Jan 04:39 PM 821638277
IV.205
"It just keeps getting warmer in here, doesn't it?" says TRAVELER, unbuttoning
the top button of his shirt. "I guess that's hard to avoid when you're
inflating a hot air balloon. Yes, it's rising...swelling...getting hotter
...right now, as we speak."
"Is that a fact?" GRAHAM says, with a coy, wide-eyed look.
"Yes, it is," says Traveler. He stands and puts his arm around her, letting
his hand rest lightly on her hip. "Come, we can go upstairs right now and
take a closer look."
"Oh, I think I'd like that," she says softly.
They walk slowly out of the room, to the nearest elevator, where Graham pushes
the call button. "Actually," he says into her ear, "there's something else I'd
like to show you too...something long and tall...full of fluid...something
that got turned on just a few minutes ago, and is quite warm by now."
"Ah, yes," she says, with carefully constructed nonchalance. "I'd love to
see your...new Lava Lamp..."
The elevator arrives, and opens; they stroll inside casually. But as soon as
the doors close again, he turns to face her. "I can't wait any longer," he
breathes, pulling her close to him and running his hands all over the velvety
fabric of her shirt.
She pushes him gently back against the wall, smiling. "Good...because I want
6*(34&^6$(&4L]\X%
NO CARRIER
User: Traveler? I just met her...
Date: 16-Jan 07:02 PM 821819002
IV.206
Really, it makes me naseaous, but I did dig the sexual inuendo part.
User: VISION
Date: 17-Jan 09:27 AM 821870871
IV.207
:)
User: Graham
Date: 18-Jan 05:13 PM 821985252
IV.208
yeah...we were being mushy...but this is our last chance to be mushy on MBBS...
:)
User: Traveler
Date: 18-Jan 11:48 PM 822008933
IV.209
A troll clad in blue scampers off from his hiding place. If his boss were
still alive, he would report the VVC for MUSHing... but she isn't.
User: SYLVAR
Date: 19-Jan 10:55 AM 822048954
IV.210
<>
*cleans up the place and cranks down the AC*
User: ECSTASY
Date: 14-Jan 04:10 PM 821635826
IV.211
it's getting a little cold in here... :)
User: SIREN
Date: 16-Jan 08:23 AM 821780600
IV.212
Ahem! No one notice all the goths lurking in the dark corners....
User: Ecstasy heading out to Nocturnia
Date: 16-Jan 11:58 PM 821836744
IV.213
Cold and gothic...the mood has been set perfectly... :)
"The Blizzard of '96 has left its mark," SYLVAR says, as the Virtual Vax Cafe
enters Board Five's airspace. Fields of moonlit snow stretch out beneath the
Cafe; their white expanses are broken only by the dark skeletons of trees and
a few buildings and roads.
"We've got a ways to go till we reach the landing coordinates given by
ECSTASY," CADO says, consulting his MBBS Atlas. Once again, the navigator and
pilot are directing the VVC's flight from the Greenhouse. But the heat is
turned up especially high tonight, against the fierce arctic winds that bear
them through the sky.
Soon a large city glitters on the horizon. Others gather in the Greenhouse to
watch the spectacle as the Cafe drifts over the metropolis. Lights are strewn
across the landscape like gems; the buildings grow into cloud-piercing towers
of glass and metal. "Night in the big city," murmurs TRAVELER. "I'll never
grow tired of it."
They begin descending toward the landing site, in a neighborhood just past the
city center. "This was an old and wealthy part of town," Cado says, "but
apparently it's gone to seed." They touch down in a vacant, snow-covered lot,
in an area of dark, decaying Victorian mansions. The balloon gently deflates,
and settles on to the roof in a heap; then all is quiet.
LOUCH and GRAHAM venture out the front door; their feet crunch on the snow,
and clouds come from their mouths in the sharp, cold air. "So where is she
supposed to meet us?" Louch says. "This neighborhood looks fairly deserted,
and not too safe. Is that a cemetery across the street?"
They go back inside, shivering. "Hey, guys, want some hot mulled wine?"
DARICELL suggests. "I could get a few bottles from the cellar and we could
spice it up."
"Great idea!" Graham says. "I'll meet you in the kitchen."
Daricell is descending the steps of the cellar when she hears the rasping of
stone on stone. _Uh-oh,_ she thinks. _Don't tell me someone's discovered
another ancient Atlantean carving..._ The source of the noise becomes
apparent in a moment. One of the large, heavy squares of stone that pave the
floor is being lifted and moved--from underneath! Daricell lingers at the foot
of the stairs, unsure of whether to get closer.
With a last clank, the stone is pushed aside by pale hands, and a burgundy-
dyed head emerges from out of the hole. "Why, hello there!" says Ecstasy.
"Surprised to see me?"
* * * *
In a few minutes she is standing in the kitchen, sipping mulled wine with the
rest of the VVC staff. "I'm so glad you've finally arrived. I'm sure you'll
be intrigued by what I have to show you."
"So...are you going to take us underground?" asks Cado.
"But of course! As soon as you're all ready, we'll go. The night is still
fairly young, by my standards, but let's not waste time. You know how the song
goes: 'Life is short, and love is always over in the morning.' And so will the
revels be."
"The revels?" Traveler says.
"Yes...my friends and I have quite a time in our hideaway. But you'll see.
Finish your wine, throw on your best coats, and we'll depart..."
User: Traveler: Underworld Remix
Date: 19-Jan 10:35 PM 822091045
IV.214
Soon the VVCers follow ECSTASY down to the cellar. They climb down through
the hole in the floor, finding a ladder beneath; it leads down a short shaft
to a dank, dripping tunnel. "Is this part of the sewer system?" GRAHAM
asks.
"It was...but it's been out of use for a long time," Ecstasy says.
They walk through a confusing series of passages and junctions, but X seems to
know where she's going at every turn. The group carries only a couple
flashlights for illumination.
"It's damp down here, but not quite as cold as it was on the surface," LOUCH
notes.
"That's right. Things stay pretty much constant down here...and that's how we
like it. Eternal night..."
Now they are walking between parallel subway tracks. But their guide assures
them that this part of the subway line has been closed off for years. They see
very dim lights somewhere ahead of them, and hear the faint murmur of voices
and music. "Where Alph the sacred river ran/Through caverns measureless to
man..." quotes Traveler.
"Yes...welcome, friends, to my pleasure dome," Ecstasy says.
They enter what looks like an old subway station. The stairways to the upper
world have been bricked over, but the station has been lovingly restored. Its
walls are covered with mosaics, that glitter by the light of torches. Chairs,
tables and couches have been brought in, and a large bar has been installed at
one end. Dozens, perhaps hundreds of people are here, dressed in dark,
elegant clothes; they sit and converse quietly, or circulate through the
crowd. The music is louder here, but still not clearly audible.
"It's beautiful!" exclaims Jon Vallee. The people on the platform begin to
notice the newcomers, and slowly grow quiet, gazing silently at them.
One man, clad in black boots and a long velvet coat, strides forward and looks
down at them from the edge of the platform. "Ecstasy...what have you brought
us tonight?"
"Friends, Tomas. And I expect them to be treated well."
"We'll take good care of them." He smiles strangely.
"Pay him no mind," X tells them. "You'll be perfectly safe here. Come, let
me show you more."
She leads them down the tracks, toward the other end of the station, where
they can see people coming down off the platform by a set of steps, and
crossing the tracks into some sort of opening in the wall. Others come out
of the opening and go up to the platform. Now they draw near the opening.
A rough passage slopes down a short distance, into a much large chamber. They
follow Ecstasy down...
...Into a vast, natural cave. On the floor, hundreds of people are dancing,
beneath dim, swirling, colored lights; a gloomy but driving Joy Division tune
echoes loudly off the walls. "This is the reason they closed this section of
the subway," X explains over her shoulder. "There was a cave-in. But it
suits our purposes wonderfully."
The VVCers mingle with the crowd at the edge of the dance floor; soon,
Traveler ventures out on to it, and persuades Graham to come with him. Cado,
Siren, and Louch begin dancing as well, while Ecstasy takes Orpheus to meet
the DJ, and SYLVAR saunters over to the cave's bar.
Some of the goth women seem to be especially delighted with Orpheus; he is
surrounded by a coterie of them as he stands next to the DJ booth. "So young,
and innocent, and delicious," one of them whispers...but X gives her a warning
look, and she quiets down.
After a short time, Orpheus has somehow convinced the DJ to let him play
several songs. He puts some Siouxsie and the Banshees on the turntable, then
mixes a few industrial dance numbers seamlessly together. The whispered
French, heavy breathing, and pounding beat of Enigma's "Sadeness (Violent U.S.
Mix)" gives way to Pop Will Eat Itself's "Dance of the Mad Bastards."
SATAN HAS TAKEN MUSIC AND HE HAD COUNTERFEITED IT
CONVOLUTED IT TWISTED IT EXPLOITED IT
AND NOW HE IS USING IT TO HAMMER HAMMER HAMMER HAMMER HAMMER
A MESSAGE INTO THE MINDS AND THE LIFESTYLES OF THIS GENERATION
Traveler laughs as the song's opening sample booms through the cavern. "One
of my most obscure favorites. Thanks, Orpheus!"
Jon has struck up a conversation with the bartender, a pale woman with spiky
black hair and an eye-of-Horus drawn (or tattooed?) around her left eye.
"So, now that I've told you my secret super mocha espresso recipe," he says,
"how about sharing the formula for some of those special smart drinks you
told me about?"
"Hmmm," she purrs. "I suppose so. But first you should know what you're
dealing with. These drinks are...strong medicine. Here, try one." She hands
him a tall glass filled with something frothy and orange.
He sips it; the bittersweet fumes seem to be absorbed directly into his brain,
and the drink itself dissolves deliciously on his tongue. "Wow," he says, as
the room begins to spin slowly around him...
User: Traveler
Date: 20-Jan 02:31 PM 822148316
IV.215
Wow!!!
I like it...
and it isn't that far off from the truth of the atlanta club scene...
User: ECSTASY
Date: 20-Jan 08:24 PM 822169488
IV.216
TRAVELER awakens slowly. FIrst he notices that his mouth is dry and his legs
are sore. Then he realizes his head is resting on a table. He sits up and
blinks; it is morning, and he is in the White Room. GRAHAM is in the seat
next to him, breathing with the quiet evenness of sleep. Various other Cafe
folk are sprawled at other tables around the room; as he watches, a few of
them begin to stir.
He stands up. "Whoa..." Dizziness--but then things calm down and stop moving.
He turns to Graham, who is rubbing her eyes and yawning. "So... do you
remember coming back here?"
"Wha-? Mmm. No...tell you the truth, I don't. Seems like we danced forever,
and I remember having some strange sort of drink. Then things got really
weird...time seemed to slow down." She runs hers fingers through tousled hair.
"I could swear we were in that place for...days..."
"Yes. It's like one of those spooky old Celtic tales, where the faeries or
the elves take you into the hillside, and give you magic ale, and you dwell
with them for ages. Then you wake up shivering on the ground, and it's only
been one night."
"Hmm. Come to think of it, didn't everyone in that place look...odd, somehow?
Sort of unnaturally pale? I'm not exactly dark-skinned, but this was
different."
Their conversation has awakened the others. Traveler gets a pad and pencil
from LOUCH's station by the door. "Okay...I'm taking breakfast orders. What
does everyone want?"
Shortly thereafter, eggs are sizzling and toast is toasting in the kitchen--
and, naturally, coffee is brewing at the Red Room bar. Several tables are
pushed together, and everyone sits down to eat. "Say, where's ECSTASY?" says
SIREN. "Did she come back?"
"Good question," says DARICELL. "I'm going to check something..." She heads
for the kitchen, and returns several minutes later, a strange expression on
her face. "I looked down in the cellar. That stone in the floor was back in
its usual place."
"I guess someone closed it up," GRAHAM says.
"But it's weirder than that. I lifted one edge, just out of curiosity...and
the hole that we climbed down into last night was gone! There's nothing
underneath but icy, packed ground."
"Weird!" Graham says. "Could someone pass me the orange juice pitcher again,
by the way? I feel sort of dehydrated."
At last the feast is finished. "Guess I'll warm up the balloon," SYLVAR says.
"We'd best be moving on to the next board...time grows short."
"Yep," says CADO. "And while there was something alluring about that
underground realm, I don't think it would be wise to spend too much time there.
I have a feeling it's the sort of place that...changes one."
Soon the balloon is inflated. Jon calls down on the intercom from the
Greenhouse. "Are we ready for takeoff?"
Traveler, helping wash dishes in the kitchen (yes, I do some of the actual
work around here!), says, "Well, I was wondering if X was going to show up...
but there's no sign of her. I guess we'll depart."
But just then, the VVC's missing bartender walks in. "Hello, all. Sorry I'm
late. I'm just not a morning person. In fact, if you all don't mind, I think
I'll retire to the Ivory Tower for a while."
"Oh, I meant to tell you," Trav says. "It suffered some fire and water damage
on Board One."
"Cado told me. I had some of my friends come and fix it up last night. Good
as new." She smirks, and heads for the stairs. But Daricell stops her for
a moment.
"Tell me something...what happened to the entrance to that place?"
"Ah...it's a hard place to find, you see. You can't really get in unless you
know someone. And outsiders are very rarely admitted. But I can tell you
that my friends approved of you all."
"Well, I'm so glad we made the grade," Traveler says, in a pleasant yet
slightly
sardonic voice.
"Oh, so am I. People of whom they don't approve...well, they never return."
"Never return _to_ the underground realm...or _from_ it?" Daricell asks. But
Ecstasy is already gone.
"There are some things it's better not to know," says Siren.
And the Cafe lifts off, into the wintry dawn...
User: t r a v e l e r
Date: 22-Jan 00:21 AM 822270176
IV.217
<>
Remember the house full of people that the Man in Black massacred, some lines
back? We resume the story the next day...
Ooooh! Macarena!
-----------------
Day. The sun rose into the morning haze, burning through dust and draperies
into inappropriate corners, troubling the sleep of the wicked and unsettling
the deeds and works of misery, like a pale mockery of divinity, shining at
last through the ripped curtains of 1313 Dummkopfstrasse. The windows stood
open, a final act by some unfortunate who lay now dead outside the window in
the planter. Flies buzzed within and without, shifting as a cloud; the
hesitant wind turned, as if unsure it was willing to enter the dark cavern of
the house. The sun, too, wavered, then bravely cast the curtains aside.
Inside, in the dark, lay a dozen mangled bodies, left in positions of horror
and surprise, arrayed about an altar of sorts. A great arc of blood, artfully
splattered, defaced a ruined pentagram, a useless gesture of warding by the
deceased.
The sun played across them, lightly, respectfully, as the wind whispered its
concerns to the banyan trees outside, and then the sun moved on. A noisome
stench came up and grew, calling far and wide, to neighbors, to animals, to
those who listened. To Maharet, whose keen nose brought her hither. While
ZOROASTER slept far away on le Rue Algerien, she made her way from rooftop to
rooftop and at last to the street of spies.
In the darkness all was quiet, until at last the sound of an engine came, and
went into silence, and then footfalls in the hall. A knock, and then the
doors were thrown open.
"Frost, you are late with your report!" called Strassenecke, as he opened the
doors, but then the German was silent as he took in the particulars of the Man
in Black's celebration of mortality. The flick of a quickly vanishing tail at
one window was the only motion.
The colonel was a hard man, inured to war, and after a moment's hesitation he
marched in among the gore. On the third try he identified Frost's body from
the loose assembly of limbs and torsos.
"Oh, you arrogant fool. Why have you done this, Frost?!" The corpse gave no
reply. "You thought you could call upon some cursed otherworldly being and
use it like a tool? You should have asked for my help. Then maybe you would
be alive, serving me."
Strassenecke stood up, rummaging between a pair of dismembered hands and what
looked to be most of a head for the phone. A moment with a handkerchief got
most of the blood from the headset, and he dialed his HQ.
"Give me Lethbridge." A moment's wait. "Ja, Alistair, I am at the house of
our most recently initiated partner...or rather, ex-partner. The little fool
has acted as we hoped, and he alone has paid for the risk. Yes, all dead.
No, you can come and bury them if you feel like it. No, no, and no: don't you
understand: now that Frost has paid the price, our hands are free. He has
brought the Man across for us! Now WE shall turn the Schwarzmensch to our
labours. We will trap him, him and that pest Zoroaster. Then, we shall gain
control of the AW files, and the day after that, the City!"
Well-satisfied, he replaced the headset, left, and gave no more thought to
corpses.
-=-=-=-=-=-
Peugeot and Zoroaster sat glumly in the booth, studying their reflections in
the grimy window. The diner was crowded and noisy, which was well to the PI's
liking. He drank from his cup of black coffee, regarding the police chief
across the rim of the mug.
"I should hate you, Peugeot."
"Me?" said the chief, in mock surprise and anguish. "Whatever for?"
"You've known about the Man for years--and about his prior visits to our fair
City. All the time I lay in my hospital bed, you knew perfectly well who had
tried to kill me.
**Op note: see _The VVC Chronicles, Part II: Ahannos, the Hands of Fate_, in
which the Man in Black nearly killed Zoroaster.**
But did you say anything? Not a word to anyone."
"My dear fellow, I assure you I acted in what I believed was your best
interest. Above all, I asked the judge to race through the trial so that
there would not be time to find any proof of DARICELL's guilt. You can hardly
blame me that the Man in Black was able to choose the jury, or that the judge
happened to be 'Hangin' Joe' Blouchard."
"I suppose not."
"Well, there you go, then. But what are we to do now? Are we to inform the
Man in Black that I repent my errors, and that the City respectfully insists
he depart?"
"Give it a shot. Let me know how it turns out," replied the PI, chancing the
briefest of smirks.
Peugeot chuckled. "No, Zoroaster, but I suspect that we must try something,
even if it is just escape. Tell me, has anyone ever tried simply firing a
cannon at him? Perhaps drop a tonne of cement on him?"
"If they tried, it obviously didn't work."
"So it would seem. Shall we combine our efforts, Monsieur Spy?"
"Very well. Let's start by trying that cannon." The chief laughed again, but
Zoroaster just turned to stare out at the greying sky.
User: Z O R O A S T E R
Date: 19-Jan 12:26 PM 822054449
IV.218
<>
I had Martian Death Flu once. 8)
I hope to have the end of VAXTREK posted by next week FRIDAY (Jan 26).
If not...then on February 1st I'll put it on the WWW at the following location:
http://grove.ufl.edu/~locutus/Vaxtrek/vt10.html
See ya soon!
User: Enterprise...8)
Date: 21-Jan 02:42 PM 822235393
IV.219
Yeah, sure, Jim, and Windows 96 will be coming out that day, too, right?
User: VENKMAN
Date: 21-Jan 02:49 PM 822235778
IV.220
and so will the epic space saga adventure thingy (TESSAT).
User: SIREN
Date: 22-Jan 08:38 AM 822299925
IV.221
And now we present:
VAXTREK X, Part 2.5!
----------------------------
Written By:
(Guess who?)
----------------------------
Based On An Idea By:
TREKKERPRISE, Ltd.
----------------------------
Special Effects By:
The ASCII Brothers, Inc.
With Thanks To:
Javagraham Graphics
----------------------------
Soundtrack Album Available From Orpheus Records
Featuring:
"Polygon Window"
Performed by Aphex Twin
"As Time Goes By"
Performed by Dooley Wilson
"I'm Young But I'm Stupid, Etc."
Performed by Alanis Morrissette
----------------------------
Digital Transfer Services By:
KERMIT
----------------------------
Promotional Consideration Provided By:
SPANG
The Unique Orange-Flavored Potted Meat Product and Drink Mix!
----------------------------
(And now, on with our story... :) )
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. : .
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. ..----.. .
. |@| @@ |@| .
. . |_|____|_|
\ \ / /
. || || .
__..............._:| ||
___:'.=================.`: || .
. . || | |__|__|__|__|__|__| | || .
.---------|| | | | | | | | | | ||----------.
.'-----====-''-.'-|--|--|--|--|--|--|-`.``-----------`.
|______________|__|__|__|__|__|__|__|__|______________|
. | | | | | _ _ | . .
| | | [1m DEEP SPACE[0m | | |_| |_| |
|______________| | [5m V V C[0m | |______________|
. | |--|_________________|--| |
| O O O _| | _ _ | |_ .^. .^. | .
. | |o| | O | | | O | |o| :.: :.: |
/'|____________|_| | |_|_| | |_|____________|`\
|--------------.__`--|_________________|--'__.--------------|
. `--------------|__|_______________________|__|--------------'
`--------------|_______________________|--------------' .
. \___________________/
. |_________________| .
. .
. .
COMM. TRAVELER: "Station log, stardate 71219.48. This is Commander Benjamin
TRAVELER on board the Federation space station Deep Space
VVC. Science officer LOUCH has determined that the enormous
energy surge that hit the station only hours ago was a
hitherto unknown variety of dimensional rift. Its effect has
been to displace DSVVC, and all aboard her, into some region
of space that is completely unknown to us. Operations chief
SYLVAR has crews repairing the structural damage suffered
during the displacement, but at this point we have no idea
how to get back where we belong. TRAVELER out."
STATION COMPUTER: "LOG ENTRY HAS BEEN RECORDED AND FILED."
(TRAVELER, the brooding, ponytailed commander of DSVVC, turns his chair away
from his desk, stares out the window of his office, and sighs.)
COMM. TRAVELER: "Of all the space stations in all the sectors in all the
Federation, and I had to be assigned to this one. It was
the middle of nowhere when I got here...now it's REALLY the
middle of nowhere! And it's all because Admiral EAS gave
me that stupid transfer for taking long lunch breaks.
Grumble, grumble, grumble..."
(The door opens, and Lieutenant CADO enters.)
COMM TRAVELER: "Report, Lieutenant."
LT. CADO: "I've made a preliminary assessment of damage from the spatial
jump. SYLVAR says most systems are working fine, except the
power generators...we're running on reserves till he gets those
back on line. Doctor DARICELL says casualties were very light
--somebody bumped their elbow rather hard during the jump."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Who?"
LT. CADO: "She said...uh...she said she's witholding that information until
later, in order to build up suspense."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Must she look at everything from a literary viewpoint?
That's what happens when your chief medical officer has an
M.D., AND an M.A. in English." :)
LT. CADO: "Well, some of the crew say that YOU look at everything from a
film viewpoint."
COMM. TRAVELER: "What?? How dare you!"
LT. CADO: "Well, as first officer I'm obliged to keep abreast of the
crew's affairs--"
COMM. TRAVELER: "Keep a WHAT? Affairs with the crew? I'm not interested in
your private life, lieutenant. I'm just a saloonkeeper."
LT. CADO: "There you go again! You're quoting _Casablanca_!"
COMM. TRAVELER: "I mean, I'm just a station commander."
LT. CADO: "Can I go now?"
COMM. TRAVELER: "Yeah, whatever."
(CADO leaves, and TRAVELER taps the comm-badge on his chest, which looks like
two V's superimposed on a C. The comm-badge, that is, not his chest. :) )
COMM. TRAVELER: "TRAVELER to SYLVAR. How are repairs going?"
CHIEF SYLVAR: "Well, sir, the power systems just won't come on line. I've
checked them four times--everything's in order, but nothing's
happening. Science Officer LOUCH and I have a theory...but
maybe you'd better comes see for yourself."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Very well. I'll be down shortly."
(Comm. TRAVELER takes a turbolift to the Blue Wing, where the power systems are
located. There, he meets up with Lietenant LOUCH and Chief SYLVAR.)
COMM. TRAVELER: "So...what have you found?"
CHIEF SYLVAR: "We've narrowed the problem down to the Folger's crystals."
COMM. TRAVELER: "You mean the crystals are damaged?"
CHIEF SYLVAR: "No, I've scanned them in every way I know how--they're in
perfect condition. For some reason, they just aren't
focusing the matter-antimatter reaction in the usual way."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Why not?"
LT. LOUCH: "This may sound weird, but I think we're in a region where the
normal laws of physics--the ones we're used to--don't operate
in the same way. Therefore, the crystals aren't working."
COMM. TRAVELER: "But...but...everything in this station--all the technology
of the Caffeinated Federation of Planets--is based on
Folger's crystals! What will we do if they don't work?"
LT. LOUCH: "Maybe there's some way to overcome the problem. But I'll need
to do some research. With your permission, I'd like to go out
in the runabout and take some readings of the surrounding area."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Permission granted."
(TRAVELER taps his comm-badge.)
COMM. TRAVELER: "Lieutenant CADO, please meet Lieutenant LOUCH at the rear
landing terrace. You'll accompany her on the U.S.S. TACOBUS
and help her with her research."
LT. CADO: "Acknowledged."
(And a few minutes later, LOUCH and CADO are on their way...)
. . . . .
. . :~~~: .
. . `._.' .
__________ ________| |
/][][][][][]| | |||||||| |
`-0------0--' ~ ~ ~ ~ ____|_||||||||_|____ . .
. . | |.. ...| _ _ | .
. |______|_vvc__|______|
. . | _ _ |_ ## _| _ _ | .
_|______|______|______|_ .
. `-------|------|-------'
. `------' .
. . .
.
(Meanwhile, TRAVELER has left Blue Wing and headed over to Black Wing, where
one of the crew lounges is located.)
COMM. TRAVELER: "I'll say one thing for this station...it's got more places
to eat and drink than you can shake a stick at." :)
(He finds ECSTASY, the bartender, wearing her usual weird black outfit and
stop-sign-shaped hat, and looking gloomy.)
COMM. TRAVELER: "What's up?"
ECSTASY: "Everything is wrong."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Isn't that the name of the new Moby album?"
ECSTASY: "No, I mean this place is wrong."
COMM. TRAVELER: "No, I think you had the title right the first time." :)
ECSTASY: "I'm not talking about Moby!"
COMM. TRAVELER: "Good, 'cause frankly, it sounds like Orpheus is playing
Aphex Twin, not Moby. So, anyway...what's up?" :)
ECSTASY (sighs): "Ever since the spatial jump, I've felt like things aren't
how they're supposed to be. This whole station isn't
supposed to look like this."
COMM. TRAVELER: "What's wrong with it?"
ECSTASY: "Well, for example--it seems to me that the lower cargo bay is
supposed to be called 'the cellar'."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Uh...have you by any chance been drinking Figgy Fizz past
its 'freshness date'? That's been shown to cause paranoid
delusions in laboratory rats, you know." :)
ECSTASY: "And the holodeck is supposed to be a movie theatre."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Hmmm...that would be kind of cool, actually. What other
'differences' have you noticed?"
ECSTASY: "Well, Operations is supposed to be the kitchen."
COMM. TRAVELER: "But we don't need a kitchen! We've got replicators all
over the place!"
ECSTASY: "Look, I'm just telling you what I feel! There's something not
right. Now you must choose whether or not to believe me."
COMM. TRAVELER: "It doesn't make much sense to me. But I'll think about it.
Anyway, I've got a lunch date with Counselor GRAHAM..."
(Commander TRAVELER heads for Red Wing, where Counselor GRAHAM is sipping
coffee and making notes on her padd. TRAVELER sits down at her table.)
COMM. TRAVELER: "Here's looking at you, kid!"
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "Oh, hi. Listen, I had an idea. DSVVC has been
transported to a completely unknown sector of space, far
outside Federation territory, correct?"
COMM. TRAVELER: "Correct."
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "Well, then according to my interpretation, that means that
Federation laws and regulations no longer apply! You can
alter or repeal any of them that you like."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Is that true??"
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "Is Humphrey Bogart a great actor?"
COMM. TRAVELER: "Ha! GRAHAM, they may have posted you here because DSVVC
and its crew were the most lawsuit-prone in Starfleet. But
having a legal counselor around is proving more useful than
I ever expected! This could be the beginning of a beautiful
friendship..."
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "Thanks. If I may make a suggestion? The first regulation
you should repeal is the one that requires Starfleet legal
counselors to study for five hours a day in order to
maintain their certification." :)
COMM. TRAVELER: "Consider it done! Now I've got one I want to repeal."
(He taps his comm-badge.)
COMM. TRAVELER: "Computer, I want to make a station-wide announcement."
STATION COMPUTER: "STATION-WIDE ADDRESS MODE ENABLED."
(Now Commander TRAVELER's words echo through Deep Space VVC.)
COMM. TRAVELER: "NOW HEAR THIS! AS COMMANDER OF THIS STATION, I HEREBY
REPEAL ALL REGULATIONS REGARDING STAFF LUNCH BREAKS!
PERSONNEL WILL NOW SET THE TIME AND LENGTH OF THEIR OWN
LUNCHES! TRAVELER OUT." :)
(Meanwhile...)
. .
.
"This is the runabout "Who's Clarence? . .
TACOBUS, requesting Heheh...just :~~~: .
clearance to land..." kidding." :) `._.' .
__________ / \ ________| |
|[][][][][][\ | |||||||| |
~ ~ `--0------0-' ____|_||||||||_|____ . .
. . | |.. ...| _ _ | .
. |______|_vvc__|______|
. . | _ _ |_ ## _| _ _ | .
_|______|______|______|_ .
. `-------|------|-------'
. `------' .
. . .
.
(TRAVELER announces a general meeting in Operations, and soon all the staff
have gathered there...well, almost.)
LT. LOUCH: "The readings I took from the runabout have led me to a startling
conclu--"
COMM. TRAVELER (looking at clock on wall): "Lieutenant LOUCH, where's CADO?
We've been waiting on him for ten
minutes. Didn't he know there was
a meeting?"
LT. LOUCH: "I think so. But as I was saying, I've concluded that--"
COMM. TRAVELER: "This is ridiculous. There's no excuse for being this late.
Computer, locate Lieutenant CADO."
COMPUTER: "LIEUTENANT CADO IS IN THE WHITE WING LOUNGE."
(TRAVELER taps his trusty comm-badge yet again.)
COMM. TRAVELER: "CADO! What are you doing? We're having a staff meeting!"
LT. CADO: "Oh, I know. But I'm not through with my lunch." :)
COMM. TRAVELER: "GRRRR."
LT. CADO: "Hey, you said we could set the time and length of our own lunches!"
COMM. TRAVELER: "Well...yes. I did. But...not the location! So bring your
lunch to Ops immediately--that's an order! TRAVELER out.
Now, LOUCH, go ahead and present your findings. We won't
wait for Lunch Boy to grace us with his presence."
LT. LOUCH (sighs): "Okay. What it all boils down to, is that I haven't got it
all figured out just yet..."
LT. SIREN: "Isn't that Alanis Morrissette?"
COMM. TRAVELER: "What are you talking about? That's LOUCH!"
LT. SIREN: "Yeah, but she was just quoting Alanis Morrissette."
COMM. TRAVELER: "This staff meeting has been delayed enough! We don't need
any more interruptions, thankyouverymuch. I don't know why
we even have a P.R. officer--it hasn't done us any good."
LT. SIREN: "Who poured Clamato on YOUR All-Bran, sweetie?"
COMM. TRAVELER: "Hey, I'm supposed to be grim and brooding, okay? It's in the
job description."
LT. SIREN: "Is that why they posted you here? I thought it was because you--"
COMM. TRAVELER: "I came to DSVVC for the waters."
LT. SIREN: "But...there aren't any waters at DSVVC."
COMM. TRAVELER: "I was misinformed." :)
LT. LOUCH: "Could I PLEASE present my findings!? It's kind of important!"
COMM. TRAVELER: "Go ahead, Lieutenant."
LT. LOUCH: "The readings I took indicate that we didn't just move a great
distance in space. We actually--"
(Just then, Lt. CADO enters, carrying a large meatball sandwich. He is chewing
and smacking noisily.)
LT. LOUCH: "AS I WAS SAYING...we actually have been displaced by the rift into
a completely different universe! If anyone cares."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Excuse me again, Lieutenant. CADO! Would you do us the
favor of eating with your mouth closed, and taking your feet
off the table?"
LT. CADO: "Lmm-mm gmm smmfmm shtuh huh...*GULP*...'Scuse me. Let me get
something straight here. *SMACK* We're outside of Federation
territory."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Yeeesss."
LT. CADO: "And, as that ill-fated Florida tourism campaign put it, 'the rules
are different here'."
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "Yes, but--"
LT. CADO: "In fact, there are no rules! So that means I can not only eat my
lunch whenever AND wherever I want, but I can put my feet on the
table, play the 'Mentos' jingle on harmonica during staff meetings,
and march around nude save for a sandwich board bearing the sign,
'TRAVELER wears women's underwear'!" :)
COMM. TRAVELER: "Why, you--"
LT. CADO: "But for now, I think I'll just play 'The Rhyming Game'."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Tell me, what's 'The Rhyming Game'?"
LT. CADO: "Saying words that sound the same!"
COMM. TRAVELER: "Have you gone completely mad??"
LT. CADO: "Yes, but I look good in plaid." :)
COMM. TRAVELER: "Someone throw him in the brig!"
LT. CADO: "I'm just rhyming, can you dig?" :)
COMM. TRAVELER: >:(
(Meanwhile, not too many parsecs away, a certain Federation starship courses
through space, painted an odd shade of green. Yes, it's the VAXERPRISE...)
. :
. .
___======_________________________________
\ = IWT VAXERPIGEON = Romulus Rules! =>= / __--__
\______________________________________/ ____________---______---___________
\_ \ \_________________________________/
. \_ \ . / : .. _/ \______/
. \_ \ / : _ / `--'
____\_ \______'-------===,
. /_| \_| : .::. | |
. \____ .: --========>== | .
----___ | | .
. . --------------' .
.
LT. COMM. ACKER: "Admiral, we're picking up something odd on long-range
sensors. It's right in our path to Romulus."
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "Do you have a visual?"
LT. COMM. ACKER: "No, but we're getting some strong readings in other spectra.
The object is an incredibly strong source of caffion
particles."
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "Is this a bad thing?"
LT. COMM. ACKER: "Well, not much is known about caffions--in fact I just got a
few in the mail from the Unknown-Particle-Of-The-Month Club.
:) But probably they'll just cause everyone on the ship to
be EXTREMELY awake for the next day or so."
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "We don't have time to take a longer route. We'll just have
to fly by this thing, whatever it is. Maintain current
heading and speed. Besides, it wouldn't hurt if everyone
stepped a little more lively around here." :)
(Back on DSVVC...)
. ..----.. .
. |@| @@ |@| .
. . |_|____|_|
. . \ \ / /
. . . || || . .
__..............._:| || .
___:'.=================.`: || . .
. . || | |__|__|__|__|__|__| | || . .
.---------|| | | | | | | | | | ||----------. .
.'-----====-''-.'-|--|--|--|--|--|--|-`.``-----------`.
|______________|__|__|__|__|__|__|__|__|______________|
. | | | | | _ _ | . .
. | | | [1m DEEP SPACE[0m | | |_| |_| |
|______________| | [5m V V C[0m | |______________|
. | |--|_________________|--| |
| O O O _| | _ _ | |_ .^. .^. | .
. | |o| | O | | | O | |o| :.: :.: | .
. /'|____________|_| | |_|_| | |_|____________|`\
|--------------.__`--|_________________|--'__.--------------|
. `--------------|__|_______________________|__|--------------'
`--------------|_______________________|--------------' .
. \___________________/ . .
. |_________________| .
. . .
. . .
COMM. TRAVELER: "Dammit, CADO, this is mutiny!"
LT. CADO: "That charge won't stand up to scrutiny."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Stop it, now! I really mean it!"
LT. CADO: "Anybody want a peanut?"
(ECSTASY, ignoring this little disagreement, turns to LOUCH.)
ECSTASY: "You say this is some kind of alternate universe from our own?"
LT. LOUCH: "Yes, I think so. There may even be alternate copies of
ourselves running around somewhere in it."
ECSTASY: "Well, that's funny, because I've been remembering an 'alternate'
DSVVC. For example, Dr. DARICELL's sickbay is supposed to be a
shop called 'Guilt Addictions.' The Arboretum is supposed to be
called the Greenhouse. Even the airlock on the upper deck--it's
supposed to be something called the 'Towel Room'."
LT. LOUCH: "Hmm...that rift may have been displaced us more than I realized.
Or, you may just be looney-tunes." :)
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "Is there any way to get back to our own reality?"
LT. LOUCH: "It would take an enormous release of energy...more energy than we
could generate, unless..."
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "Unless what?"
LT. LOUCH: "Unless we blew up the station."
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "Oh MY. Scratch THAT idea."
(Meanwhile, on the VAXERPRISE...)
. ___ ___ .
|_|_| __---__ |_|_|
___\_/_____---_______---_____\_/___
\_________________________________/
\\_ \_______/ _// .
. \\_ `---' _//
\\..-|_|-..//
. . `/ .---. \' .
| | o | |
\ `___' /
`-----'
LT. OVERDOSE: "We're getting first visual contact with the object."
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "On screen."
.--------------------------------------------------------------.
| . . . .|
| . :~~~: . |
| . `._.' . |
| ________| | |
| | |||||||| | |
| ____|_||||||||_|____ . |
| | |.. ...| _ _ | . |
| . |______|_vvc__|______| |
| . | _ _ |_ ## _| _ _ | |
| _|______|______|______|_ . |
| `-------|------|-------' |
| `------' . |
`--------------------------------------------------------------'
COUNSELOR BELGARATH: "Looks like a wedding cake gone horribly wrong." %)
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "I don't care what it looks like. Just steer us around it,
helm, with as little deviation from our course as
possible."
(LT. OVERDOSE pushes a button on his console, but the button makes the sort of
sound that means "Mr. Button isn't happy.")
LT. OVERDOSE: "Uh...something's wrong."
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "Care to elaborate?"
LT. OVERDOSE: "Uh...Mr. Button isn't happy. I mean, the helm controls have
locked up." :)
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "Engineering! The helm has suddenly locked up."
LT. COMM. PALLAS: "And I suppose you want ME to find out why. Checking..."
(Meanwhile, on DSVVC...)
COMM. TRAVELER: "I demand you stop at once!"
LT. CADO: "Now who's feeling like a dunce?"
(Dr. DARICELL whispers something in TRAVELER's ear. TRAVELER smiles.)
COMM. TRAVELER: "Stop it, or I'll throw this orange!"
LT. CADO: ".....Wh-? Darn! I guess you win."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Yes. DARICELL just reminded me that nothing rhymes with
'orange'." :)
LT. SIREN: "And nothing says lovin' like cookies from the oven! ...Sorry.
My advertising instincts sometimes get the better of me."
MYSTERIOUS VOICE: "Out Of Context Theatre!"
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "While you all have been bickering, the sensors seem to
have picked up an approaching vessel. Take a look."
.--------------------------------------------------------------.
| |
| . . . |
| _vv____-~-____vv_ . |
| . `--..--.---.--..--' |
| . \\ ~H~ // . |
| . \\H// . . |
| . . /~_~\ |
| \_~_/ |
| . . . |
| |
`--------------------------------------------------------------'
CHIEF SYLVAR: "Looks like a Capuccino class starship, heading directly for
us!"
COMM. TRAVELER: "Counselor, open a channel to them."
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "Channel opened. Go ahead."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Approaching starship: please identify yourself. This is
Commander Benjamin TRAVELER of the Caffeinated Federation
of Planets, aboard Deep Space VVC."
(There is no response.)
CHIEF SYLVAR (looking at a console): "Our comm systems don't seem to be
working properly. In fact, they're
losing range rapidly. And some of
our other systems are failing too!"
LT. LOUCH: "They're getting closer, and they're not changing course."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Approaching starship: you have permission to dock at the
Ivory Docking Pylon, if you desire. But PLEASE reduce your
speed!"
LT. CADO: "If we're having systems failures, maybe they are too. Maybe
they can't change course!"
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "I know what THAT feels like. I remember back at Starfleet
Academy Law School, I wanted to change a course, but the
drop-add period was over. Luckily, I talked to the Dean,
and everything was straightened out..." :)
(Back on board the VAXERPRISE...)
.______ .______
_________ .______
.____ ___--- o ---___ .______
_- -_ _____________________________________
_/ \_ /_____| \
/ \ \_____|_______________________________/
/ \ / _/
/ \ .___ / _/ .______
| _______ |`-----__/_/ .______
| ,- __ -- || `----, .______
|o |:(__) ) ||=: O |) ._______
| `-_______-- || ____,----' .______
| |'----- \ \_ ____ .______
\ / \ \_
\ / ________\___\_________________________
\_ _/ /_____| \
\_ _/ \_____|________________________________/
___ -___ ___- .______
---____o____--- .______
.______ .______
LT. COMM. PALLAS: "We're in trouble. Not only is the helm locked, but other
systems are starting to fail as well. I think it's got
something to do with the caffion radiation coming from the
object."
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "Hail the...thing in front of us. Warn them that we can't
change course."
LT. OVERDOSE: "Umm...Mr. Communications System isn't happy." :(
ADMIRAL TREKKER: :(
(On DSVVC...)
COMM. TRAVELER: "Can you move us out of their path with our maneuvering
thrusters?"
CHIEF SYLVAR: "Thrusters are down. Everything's going down! We'll lose
life support soon, I'm afraid."
(Lt. LOUCH breaks out her tricorder and takes some readings.)
LT. LOUCH: "Commander, the station is being bombarded with some unusual
kind of radiation from that ship. If I had to guess, I'd say
they're carrying large quantities of dilithium."
CHIEF SYLVAR: "Dilithium? But that's a harmless substance used to make a
popular hot beverage!"
LT. LOUCH: "Maybe in our universe. But here there seems to be a different
form! I think our Folger's crystals are interfering with their
dilithium crystals."
DR. DARICELL: "No, their dilithium crystals are interfering with our Folger's
crystals!"
LT. SIREN: "Sounds like a commercial."
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "She was just demonstrating how a slight change in phrasing
can completely shift the blame to the other side." :)
ECSTASY: "We must do something! They're getting closer!"
.--------------------------------------------------------------.
| . ___ ___ . |
| |_|_| __---__ |_|_| |
| ___\_/_____---_______---_____\_/___ |
| \_________________________________/ |
| \\_ \_______/ _// |
|. \\_ `---' _// |
| \\..-|_|-..// |
| . `/ .---. \' . |
| | | o | | |
| \ `___' / |
| `-----' |
`--------------------------------------------------------------'
LT. CADO: "DARICELL, I think now would be a good time to reveal that plot
secret from earlier. Namely: whose elbow got bumped when we
passed through the rift?"
DR. DARICELL: "Oh, yeah...it was mine."
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "Not much of a payoff to THAT joke." :)
COMM. TRAVELER: "Yeah...well, the author of this story is just some hack,
and he hasn't had enough sleep in days. What do you expect?"
(On the VAXERPRISE:)
LT. COMM. ACKER: "Collision in fifteen seconds!"
.--------------------------------------------------------------.
| __..............._:| || |
| ___:'.=================.`: || . . |
| . || | |__|__|__|__|__|__| | || . |
| .---------|| | | | | | | | | | ||----------. |
| .'-----====-''-.'-|--|--|--|--|--|--|-`.``-----------`. |
| |______________|__|__|__|__|__|__|__|__|______________| |
| | | | | | _ _ | . |
| | | | [1m DEEP SPACE[0m | | |_| |_| | |
| |______________| | [5m V V C[0m | |______________| |
| | |--|_________________|--| | |
| | O O O _| | _ _ | |_ .^. .^. | |
| | |o| | O | | | O | |o| :.: :.: | |
| /'|____________|_| | |_|_| | |_|____________|`\ |
`--------------------------------------------------------------'
COUNSELOR BELGARATH: "ALL HANDS BRACE FOR IMPACT!"
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "Will that help our chances of survival?"
COUNSELOR BELGARATH: "Not in the slightest. But it's my job to try to make
everyone feel better."
(On DSVVC:)
DR. DARICELL: "This reminds me of a novel. I think it was something by Tom
Clancy..."
CHIEF SYLVAR: "I guess this is the end. It's been a pleasure serving with
you all...most of the time, anyway..."
COMM. TRAVELER: "Counselor GRAHAM, would you hold my hand?"
COUNSELOR GRAHAM: "Well, that's not exactly in my job description..."
COMM. TRAVELER: "This is a personal request, not a professional one."
COUNSELOR GRAHAM (taking his hand): "Okay, then. Computer, play 'As Time
Goes By'." :)
STATION COMPUTER: "ACCESSING MUSIC LIBRARY."
(The strains of the old tune fill the air.)
COMM. TRAVELER: "Here's looking at you, kid..."
(And an instant later...)
. ..----.. .
. |@| @@ |@| .
. . |_|____|_|
. . \ \ / /
. . . || || . .
__..............._:| || .
___:'.=================.`: || . .
. . || | |__|__|__|__|__|__| | || . .
.---------|"___ | | | | | | | | ___---------. .
.'-----====-'|___||--|--|__---__-|--|-`|___|---------`.
|_________ ___\_/_____---.--.--.---_____\_/___ _______|
. | \____\\_______\__:__/_______//____/_ _ | . .
. | | \\_ D\__| |__/ _//| |_| |_| |
|______________| | \\_ V `| |' _// |______________|
| |--|___\\..=====..//_|--| |
| O O O _| | `/|||||||\' | |_ .^. .^. | .
. | |o| | O|_-------_| | |o| :.: :.: | .
. /'|____________|_| | \ / | |_|____________|`\
|--------------.__`--|______`-----'____|--'__.--------------|
. `--------------|__|_______________________|__|--------------'
`--------------|_______________________|--------------' .
. \___________________/ . .
. |_________________| .
. . .
. ..----.. .
. |@| @@ |@| .
. . |_|____|_|
. . * * \ \ / /
. . ** _\ \*| */*_ ||* || \*. .
\ __-~/..**====_\~--:| || * * .
* ___\'.=====~* ***====.`: || /* /
. * . \ || |\|_ _|_***_|_**__| | || / \ ------. .
\ .--------\ "___ | *|* * *| |*| __/ --- \___ * `. * .
_\-----====-\|___|* **__---__ *** * |___| --\*__ \_*_//
*-_/ / *_*___ ___\_/_____---.--.--.---_____\_/___ ____\*_----*
. | */*/ \____\\_______\__:__/_______//____/_ _ | . .
._-| /_/ *-_ * \\_ \__| |__/ _// * _-*_| |_| |
*~ /|/|__________~-_ * * \\_ `| |' _//* /_-~ _______/*/|
/ | *-/ \\..=====..// *------* /*/|
* | O O O _* * * `/|||||||\' ----* .^. .^.|_\|--* .
. | *---~~~~ * |_-------_| * o| :.: :.: |* .
. /'|____________|_| * \ / ~-_ _|____________|`\
|----------\----___ * */ `-----'\ ~*'__.--------------|
. `----------~~--_*__~\ ***/ */* |* * ____|__|--------------'
`-------/ |__|-|* ~-_*___/___|_________|--------------' .
. * _-~|___\* \____*___*_______/ . .
. *~ /\__*\* \_____________| .
. * |____\**\ .
** *
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. ** _ \ |/@/-@// '\ .
* \ /*--\\~-**_-_/@/@/ .
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. \ . \ *| ***|_ * * **** *** \ ------. .
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. || /* *-_ * \ _ _ //_ *-* . .
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/ \ O* * || ** *^. |_\|--* .
* . | * *-* |_- ---- * ** * . : * .
* *
. /'|____* ** * \ / ~-_ ** ___`\
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----- ***- _** / |* * * -----~-__------'
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**---/ _/ | ***\****------ ' .
. / _-|__*** **_* * ***/ \ . .
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. * * **__\** ***| * .
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/ *
*
. . . . .
. .
. .
. . .
. .
.
. . . .
..
.
. . .
. . . . . .
.
.
.
. . .
. .
. :
. .
___======_________________________________
\ = IWT VAXERPIGEON = Romulus Rules! =>= / __--__
\______________________________________/ ____________---______---___________
\_ \ \_________________________________/
. \_ \ . / : .. _/ \______/
. \_ \ / : _ / `--'
____\_ \______'-------===,
. /_| \_| : .::. | |
. \____ .: --========>== | .
----___ | | .
. . --------------' .
.
. .
. .
. .
LT. COMM. ACKER: "Admiral, we're picking up something odd on long-range
sensors. It's right in our path to Romulus."
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "Do you have a visual?"
LT. COMM. ACKER: "Not yet. In fact...hmm, it's gone. Looked like a small
rift in the space-time continuum, that opened and closed for
just a few seconds."
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "Anything else?"
LT. COMM. ACKER: "Nope. We're maintaining course and speed for Romulus. All
systems functioning normally."
(He checks his console.)
LT. COMM. ACKER: "Wait--I'm picking up a small object floating near where the
rift appeared."
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "Have it beamed on board for analysis."
(Meanwhile, below decks...)
ENSIGN BULLWINKLE: "Are you trying to say we're nothing more than story
padding?!"
ENSIGN EGGMAN (pressing lots of buttons): "Yep." 8)
ENSIGN BULLWINKLE: "That's sad."
LT. FLOUNDER: "Kinda sums up the entire VAXTREK experience, don't ya think?"
LT. ZENMASTER: "Yep." :(
ENSIGN CADO: "Hey, at least it's better than the VVC." :)
LT. ZENMASTER: "The what?"
ENSIGN BULLWINKLE (Whispers to ZEMNASTER): "Don't make eye-contact. He's
delirious from the heat." :)
(Moments later, TREKKER strolls into Ten Forward/Cindy's Bar and Grill, holding
the object that was beamed on board. He sets it down on the bar:)
______________________
| |____
| [7mAs Time Goes By...[0m |__ |
| | | |
| D E E P S P A C E | | |
| |__| |
| [1m | | | | |~~[0m |____|
| [1m \/ \/ |__[0m |
\__________________/
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "ROMANTIC, do you know much about movies?"
ROMANTIC: "I've taken my share of Film Studies classes. Why?"
ADMIRAL TREKKER: "Tell me about..._Casablanca_..." :)
. .
. .
. . .
. .
.
. . . .
..
.
. . .
. . . . . .
T H E E N D
(for now!)
----------------------------
NEXT:
The VVC meets up with an old friend...
Is pursued by an old enemy...
And rips off yet another literary genre!
----------------------------
Tune in next time, as:
The Virtual Vax Cafe visits Board Three!
----------------------------
User: Commander TrAvElEr, C.F.P. :)
Date: 23-Jan 07:44 PM 822426521
IV.222
*whew*
User: Traveler
Date: 23-Jan 07:57 PM 822427025
IV.223
Haven't we read this story before?
Yeah, last Saturday night.....
User: VENKMAN
Date: 23-Jan 08:29 PM 822428976
IV.224
*laugh*
User: ECSTASY
Date: 23-Jan 10:56 PM 822437814
IV.225
Saturday night's alright for VAXing...
Max, you've outdone yourself. Beautiful. And that's a damn good cuppa joe.
User: SYLVAR
Date: 24-Jan 02:06 PM 822492420
IV.226
*falls over laughing* That was great, Max!
So does this make me Dr. Mistress Dark Lady?
User: The Dark Lady is preparing a surprise for Herr Max. :)
Date: 27-Jan 11:46 PM 822786375
IV.227
<>
Peugeot contemplates his coffee for a moment, then says quietly, "Mon amis, I
have not always been forthright with you regarding certain vital matters. But
there are some things you are concealing as well, I believe."
ZOROASTER looks at him with the slitted eyes of a cat. "Such as?"
Peugeot's glance flickers around the room. "Let us go for a drive, oui? We
may speak in your car."
They pay, leave the diner, and climb into the detective's sedan. Zoroaster
pulls on to Boulevard Brechentraum, and they cruise through midday traffic.
"So...tell me about what I'm concealing."
"The AW files."
Zoroaster's face is impassive. "Which files are those?"
"Oh, come, don't play with me. You know about them. A great deal, I think."
"I've never heard of them. But please, enlighten me."
"Very well. Let us suppose you know nothing. It will be an amusing game,"
the police captain says. "The AW files--a rumored set of documents much
sought after in shadowy circles. Men have killed and died for them, and yet
never a word in the papers. Some say the fate of the City hangs on these
files--on who gains control of them. Ah, but you know nothing, of course.
Understand: what I am about to tell you are secrets that have cost lives.
These are big secrets...maybe the biggest in this City."
"I've heard a few big secrets. Shoot."
"The AW files were compiled many years ago, at the behest of the City's chief
executive. They consisted of confidential plans for the civil defense--
contigency plans in case of all sorts of disasters. Flood, fire, siege,
revolt, even plague--the files covered it all. It is said that the initials
AW stood for Armageddon Wall, referring to a part of the plans in which the
walls around the old City would be secured and all gates closed and
barricaded. But I don't know if that part is true.
"The files included the most detailed maps of the City ever made--showing a
secret network of underground vaults and tunnels beneath the streets. These
catacombs contained huge stockpiles of emergency and military supplies, and
could also be used as shelters against war or natural catastrophe. There was
_no_other_record_or_map_ of the locations of most of these vaults!
"And the files contained something else...a whole set of pre-drafted executive
orders. These would suspend citizens' normal rights and impose a 'special
period' of martial law, to be continued until the power-that-be decided
otherwise. These orders were cleverly written, to take advantage of laws
already on the books allowing the government unspecified 'emergency powers' in
'extraordinary circumstances'.
"And they were designed to quell any opposition quickly and efficiently--first
the media would be put under control, then the streets would be secured, a
curfew imposed, et cetera. It boils down to this: it would be a piece of cake
to take over the City if you possessed a copy of the AW files..."
User: Traveler
Date: 21-Jan 03:55 AM 822196567
IV.228
"If you'll forgive my asking, what does all this have to do with matters at
hand...such as the Man in Black?" ZOROASTER says.
"I'll get to that shortly. But first I must emphasize: these files were so
secret, there were never more than two copies in existence. One was kept in
the City Archives, and another in a safe at the executive mansion."
Zoroaster looks over at Peugeot. "The mansion which burned to the ground a
few weeks ago?"
"The very one. I am glad you do not feign ignorance of what this represents."
"An attempt to steal or destroy one copy. What about the Archives copy?"
"Ah, this is very amusing. The Archives Department, like the rest of the
government, is decrepit and corrupt."
"I know. Abdul in the Public Records Room has always been such a help to me
...when I've paid him well."
"You know Abdul? Why, he and I used to play poker together!"
"Yeah, he's a great poker player. But a lousy records clerk."
"The three of us simply must get a game going. There's no decent high-stakes
gambling in this town, since the Indigo Toucan...but where was I?"
"In the decrepit and corrupt Archives Department."
"Ah, oui. Well, the copy of the AW files in the Archives was stolen. In fact
it's been missing for years. No one knows how long! But the Chief Archivist,
fearing for his job, said nothing. Only recently was the theft discovered."
"Any idea who took them?"
"I think you know as well as I...but all right, I will play along. All
evidence points to the Resistance--that ragged band of revolutionaries that is
as disorganized as the City government, and as impossible to eradicate. You
have a number of friends in the Resistance, non?"
"I have some acquaintances, but you know I'm not one of them. Their cause is
hopeless, and their methods absurd," Zoroaster says scornfully.
"Nonetheless, they have stolen the AW files, and people are noticing."
Zoroaster lights a cigarette. "Let's say I know about these files. Frankly,
the Resistance are the best people to hold them--they're too weak to use
them."
"Ah, I agree completely. But the government wants the files back, and might
well use them some day," Peugeot says. "And worse, the Hierarchy wants them.
Now, let us drop pretenses--you know of the Hierarchy."
"I know of some powerful men who would like to run the City government for
their own ends. You mean they've got wind of the AW files' theft?"
"They consider the files to be rightfully theirs, and the key to their plans
for takeover." Peugeot leans close to Zoroaster. "I believe it was they who
summoned _him_--the Man in Black. I know of one of them, a government
official named Frost, with a taste for sorcery. I am certain it was his
dabbling in the black arts that brought the Man through."
"They thought to use him to recover the files?" Zoroaster scoffs. "No one
uses the Man in Black."
"But this idiot Frost is arrogant enough to try. So are the rest of them,
probably. Listen: you must tell you...acquaintances...in the Resistance to
lie low, not to even think about using the files. If there is the slightest
sign that they are making a move, the government and the Hierarchy will join
to crush the Resistance, and then fight it out between them. In such a
conflict, I fear the City would be torn apart, destroyed. Countless people
would perish."
"And there is still the Man to worry about."
"Oui. Ah, here is the Seventh Precinct Station; could you drop me here?" The
private eye stops at the curb, and Peugeot climbs out. "My friend, take care.
I will be in touch very soon. Remember: the files must not be used! And keep
an eye out for _him_."
"Same to you." Zoroaster pulls away, back into traffic. He realizes he has
not seen Maharet since returning to the City early this morning. _Time to see
her again, find out what she's learned during her prowling,_ he thinks. _And
make sure she's all right..._
User: traveler, weaving threads together...
Date: 22-Jan 00:25 AM 822270350
IV.229
Hours later, ZOROASTER was boarding a freighter at the City marina, half-dead
from exhaustion and desperation.
But how that came to pass is another story (one which will be told shortly).
Meanwhile, proceed to Board 3, where we pick up his trail...
User: Traveler
Date: 24-Jan 10:58 PM 822524314
IV.230
<>
THE VISIT OF THE VIRTUAL VAX CAFE
TO BOARD THREE
A Dramatic Interlude in One Act
In the Manner of William Shakespeare
Scene I. A deserted island.
Enter ZOROASTER, dragging a life raft.
ZOROASTER
Oh, that the too too solid ice had melted,
Thawed, and dissolved into the waters blue,
Or that the stormy Ocean had not sent
His iceberg 'gainst our freighter. O void, void,
How empty, cruel, flat and unhabitable
Seem to me all the reaches of this isle!
Fie on't, ah, fie, 'tis an unpeopled desert
That grows no food. Things dead and dry in nature
Possess it merely. That I should come to this
But two days out, nay, not so much, not two,
So excellent a ship, that was to this
The QE2 to a toy boat, so stable on the waters
That it would not permit the winds and weather
Trouble the folk on board her. Heaven and earth,
Had we to founder? Why, she would ride the seas
As if increase of storminess had made
Her sail more steady; and yet within a day--
Let me not think on't; frailty, thou was my freighter--
A little day, or ere the tug had vanished
By which we'd followed the port channel's pathway,
Ere yet the salt of the unquiet seas
Had brought a stinging to my squinting eyes,
She foundered. O, most weak a ship, to sink
With such temerity to unfathomed depths!
It did not, nor it cannot do me good.
But strangers come, so let me hold my tongue.
Enter TRAVELER, SYLVAR, and CADO.
ZOROASTER
Hail to you, comrades!
TRAVELER
We are glad to see you well.
Zoroaster--or I do forget myself.
And what make you from the City, Zoroaster?
ZOROASTER
Sylvar.
SYLVAR
My good friend.
ZOROASTER
It is very good to see you. [To CADO.] Good even, sir.
TRAVELER
But what, in faith, make you from the City?
ZOROASTER
A fearful disposition, my good friend.
TRAVELER
I would not hear your enemy say so
Nor shall you do my ear that violence
Against yourself. I know you are no coward.
But what is your affair on this lone isle?
We'll give you drink soon at yon VVC.
ZOROASTER
My friend, I came to flee my freighter's foundering.
TRAVELER
I think it was to leave the City's confines.
ZOROASTER
Indeed, my friend, it followed hard upon.
TRAVELER
Thrift, thrift, Zoroaster. The captain, to save cash,
Did not update the navigator's tables.
Ah, but we met your darkest foe on Earth
Before we left the City, Zoroaster!
The Man, methinks I see the Man.
ZOROASTER
Where, my friend?
TRAVELER
In my mind's eye, Zoro.
ZOROASTER
I saw him once. 'A was a ghastly foe.
TRAVELER
'A was a man, take him for all in all,
I hope we shall not meet his like again.
ZOROASTER
My friend, I met him just a while ago.
TRAVELER
Met? Who?
ZOROASTER
Our friend, the Man in Black.
TRAVELER
The Man in Black?
ZOROASTER
Season your apprehension for a while
With an attent ear till I may deliver
This terror to you.
TRAVELER
For God's love let me hear!
ZOROASTER
Three days ago had I and Chief Peugeot
In the warm hours and middle of the morn
Been thus encountered. The figure of the Man,
Dressed in black completely, head to toe,
Appears before us, and with the solemn march
Comes slow and stately toward us, whilst we, reduced
Almost to Jello[tm] with the act of fear,
Drove off, and ran him over.
TRAVELER
Where was this?
ZOROASTER
My friend, the parking lot of your Cafe.
TRAVELER
Did you escape from him?
ZOROASTER
Oh, yes, we did;
And ran him down besides. Yet then we saw
He stood back up and once again did walk:
And later on the black fiend tracked me home,
And when he came, I fled in haste away,
And jumped a leaving ship.
TRAVELER
'Tis very bad.
ZOROASTER
As I do live, good Traveler, 'tis true,
And Maharet did leap on him in fury
To help me flee from him.
TRAVELER
Alas, alas, sir, how this troubles me.
If we assume the worst of this dark person
He'll seek for us though hell itself should gape
And bid his killing cease. I pray you all,
If you have hitherto withstood this fright,
Let us be unified in our courage still.
Aboard the Cafe, to another board,
We'll journey now.
ALL
Our duty, to our honor.
TRAVELER
Your loves, as mine to you. I'll join you soon.
Exeunt all but TRAVELER.
The Man in Black--returned? All is not well.
I fear some bad end. Would we'd left the boards!
Till then sit still, my soul. Dark death will rise,
Though all the earth o'erwhelm it, to our eyes.
Exit.
Enter THE MAN IN BLACK, solus.
THE MAN IN BLACK
Now is the winter of Zoroaster's flight
Made glorious summer by this stroke of luck,
His bruised arms entwined round DARICELL,
His dark travails changed to merry meetings.
But I, that am not shaped for happy tales
Have no delight to pass away the time
Unless to cast my shadow over Vax
And unleash all mine own insanity.
And therefore, since I cannot prove a lover
To entertain these last virtual days
I am determined to prove a villain
And hate the idle folk of this Cafe.
Plots I'll lay, invitations dangerous,
And if the VVCers be such fools
As I am subtle, false and treacherous
Then soon should all of them be tangled up
Inside my final scheme, and they shall see
That I the killer of them all shall be.
Exit.
(Based on _Hamlet_, Act I, Scene ii, lines 129-258, and
on _Richard III_, Act I, Scene i, lines 1-40. Look 'em
up if you don't believe me.)
:)
User: Traveler
Date: 24-Jan 11:00 PM 822524532
IV.231
*applause*
i had a tomato all ready, but i guess i won't throw it. :)
User: SIREN
Date: 25-Jan 08:27 AM 822558450
IV.232
Proceed to Board Ten...
And prepare for some gore.
:)
"...O, from this time forth,
My thoughts be bloody, or be nothing worth!"
--Hamlet
User: Traveler
Date: 27-Jan 03:16 PM 822755802
IV.233
Zounds!
*applauds for the iambic pentameter exercise*
User: Daricell, once more... hi y'all!
Date: 27-Jan 11:27 PM 822785267
IV.234
what does the vice-president have to do with this?
User: SIREN
Date: 28-Jan 11:30 AM 822828630
IV.235
<>
"who taught the killing game?"
==============================
The bright sun slanting through the window of ZOROASTER's office fails to
dispel the sense of gloom within. The detective is slumped in his chair behind
his desk; DARICELL stands behind him, kneading his shoulders, and TRAVELER and
CADO sit in front, their faces grim.
"When you were in the lifeboat, how strong was your impression of being
followed?" Trav asks.
"How does one measure such a thing?" Zoroaster says wearily. "I thought I
glimpsed something, between waves. Could have been a small boat, or debris, or
my imagination."
"You've been awake for almost two days," Daricell says. "Who knows what tricks
your mind's been playing on you?"
"Well, the Man was coming after the Cafe when we left Board Six," Cado says.
"And he pursued Zoro right to the marina. We have to assume he could be a
continuing threat. I'm heightening security for the rest of our trip."
"Good man," says Traveler. "BTW, what's our ETA?"
"SYLVAR should be taking us down to our landing coordinates now." They look
out the window. A tall, rectangular building towers over a small town. The
building's appearance is quite distinctive: it is covered with chrome, glass,
neon, and blinking lights. The top is curved, and mostly glass, giving a view
of a large chamber within.
Zoroaster frowns. "Am I just REM-deprived...or is that a giant jukebox?"
Cado laughs. "Ah, it's the Temple of Music--the chief attraction here on
Board Ten. Presided over by the two Music Goddesses, SATRIANI and MIRANDA.
We'll be taking a tour shortly."
"Sounds smashing, but I'll pass. Traveler--the guest room in your apartment--"
"It's yours. Go, get some sleep."
"But not before you have a little more to eat," Daricell says. "I'll bring you
up some sandwiches."
"Ah, a fair handmaiden at my beck and call," Zoroaster says, smiling faintly.
"Watch it, bub! You deserve a little nurturing, but I ain't no handmaiden..."
* * *
Moments later, they touch down on the wide lawn in front of the Temple of
Music. TRAVELER, GRAHAM, SYLVAR, LOUCH, CADO and SIREN gather in the White
Room, ready to take the tour. At the last minute, the quiet young D.J Orpheus,
who has mostly avoided outings on the other boards, joins them. "Hey, Orphy,
glad you're coming along!" Trav says. Orpheus whispers something in his ear.
"Yes, I hear it's a place no music lover should miss."
They walk toward the grand doors at the foot of the Temple, but their way is
blocked by a large sign:
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS
DUE TO CORPORATE RESTRUCTURING
AND IMMINENT APOCALYPSE
Everyone groans. "Don't worry," says Traveler. "Miranda mentioned something
about this to me. She said we can go on inside anyway--she'll give us a
personal tour."
Inside is a dark, cool, high-ceilinged lobby. The building is wider than it is
deep; ethereal music drifts in the dimness...a choir singing in Latin? The
place seems almost like a Gothic cathedral, until the ding of an elevator
breaks the spell. Doors slide open in the middle of the left wall, and light
pours out, silhouetting the robed figure of Miranda.
"Greetings!" she says. "Sorry it's so dark in here...the place is officially
closed, so we're keeping most of the lights out. I'm the only one here right
now--but my sister Music Goddess is due back from vacation today. Alas,
there's a pink slip waiting for her. :( Come, I'll take you upstairs."
The VVCers board the large, glass-walled elevator, and it begins its creep up
the outside of the Temple. "As you can see," she says, pointing to the
elevator's control panel, "there are floors for every kind of music: classical,
jazz, pop, techno, musicals, soundtracks, et cetera. Our archives contain
every piece of music ever recorded! It's all open to the public, for browsing,
listening or buying--or was, until now."
"What happened? What does that sign out front mean?" Cado asks.
Miranda sighs. "Downsizing. The head office figured this was a bad location,
especially since MBBS is about to go bye-bye. They're redirecting their
resources to other continuums, and closing this branch. I'll have to find a
job elsewhere."
"Bummer," says Graham. "I would have liked to spend some time in this place."
The elevator stops. "Here we are! The Listening Room." The doors open, and
Miranda leads them out into the large, glass-domed chamber at the top of the
Temple...
* * * *
The Listening Room is a wide, modern place. The music they heard downstairs
saturates them here. The glass front wall curves up and overhead to become the
ceiling; the back and side walls are opaque, but trimmed with colored neon.
The back wall has rows of stepped seating like an amphitheatre, and above the
seats are large, ornate words stretching all the way across:
T H E T E M P L E O F M U S I C
At the very center of the chamber is a circular dais, on which stands a wide
pillar about three feet high. Miranda leads the group to the front row of
seats, closest to the the dais, then mounts it and stands by the pillar.
"Welcome to the Listening Room," she says, "the most acoustically perfect place
in the universe. You can't see the sound system that's generating the music
around us--that's because the walls themselves resonate to produce the sound.
The glass dome behind me is curved in a precisely calculated way--it's
hemidemisemispherical, so that it reflects and focuses vibrations in a way
that seems perfect no matter where you are in the room."
"Player?" says Orpheus, his voice halting but his body leaning forward as he
points to the pillar on the dais.
"That's right! This is the Master Player. I and my sister Goddess select a
daily program of music from the archives on the floors below, and play it from
here. Right now we're listening to Enya's latest, _The Memory of Trees_; but
it will be time for another selection soon."
An elevator opens, directly across from the one on which the VVC group came up,
and Satriani emerges, wearing a robe like Miranda's. "Welcome, Satch," says
Miranda quietly. "Did you get the news?"
Satriani sighs. "Yes, there was a note in my box downstairs. Alas...but we
knew it was coming. I suppose all good things must come to an end."
"Well, it's almost time for the Changing of the Disc. Would you like to
perform the ceremony, or shall I?"
"You can do it. I'll summon the acolyte." Satriani goes over to an intercom
panel on one wall, and murmurs something into it. Then she returns, ands
stands waiting by the dais, as Miranda stands before the pillar.
Enya's voice and music fade and grow silent. A moment later, the elevator
doors by which Satch entered open again, and a figure emerges, in a robe cut
like those of the Goddesses, but colored all in black and with a hood. The
acolyte, face concealed by the hood, walks solemnly to the dais with head
bowed, holding a CD case out at arms' length.
The acolyte approaches the dais and stands waiting. Miranda reaches down to
the top of the pillar, and picks up the CD case lying there. She hands it
to Satriani, who opens it. Then Miranda lifts the CD that has just been
playing from the depression in the center of the pillar, and places it in the
case that Satch is holding out. Satch closes the case and turns to the
acolyte, and they exchange cases. Then she opens the new case. Miranda
removes the disc and places it in the player, then sets the case next to the
player.
She touches a button, and there is the faint sound of the player spinning up to
speed. Then, a barrage of industrial noise and hoarse words:
/awaken eyes sewn wearing glasses dripping tapping at the temple door locked
inside.../
Miranda turns and looks sharply at Satriani. "Skinny Puppy? This isn't what
we selected!"
/scream inner scraping tooth and nail nowhere to go quiet retraces.../
The acolyte throws back his hood and leaps on to the dais, grinning. It is the
Man in Black.
User: Traveler
Date: 27-Jan 03:18 PM 822755954
IV.236
/forcing light tears then pretend nothing blinds minds closed in sanctuary.../
Before anyone can react, he pulls a shotgun from beneath his robe, and fires
toward the amphitheatre seats. The Cafe group scatters, screaming and
shouting. But there is nowhere to hide. The Man takes potshots at the figures
scurrying in the sunlight, laughing sadistically. CADO nears one of the
elevators, and is reaching for the call button when a blast of buckshot tears
into the wall inches from his head. He snatches his hand back; the call button
and the intercom have both been destroyed.
The Man in Black turns and shoots, without bothering to aim, toward GRAHAM and
TRAVELER as they run across the front of the room. He misses, but shatters a
large hole in the vast curving window. With another blast, he disables the
other elevator. Now everyone in the room except the Man and the two Goddesses
is cowering on the floor or in the corners.
/closed in sanctuary padded walls not quiet.../
He stops firing. "Good...now let's get serious..." He steps off the dais and
walks briskly toward where Orpheus and SYLVAR are huddled on an amphitheatre
bench. "First the idiot and the pacifist..."
"NO!" shouts SATRIANI, running toward him. He turns, drops his gun, and pulls
out the CD case she handed him moments ago. With lazy speed, he flicks open
the case, takes out the disc, and sends it spinning through the air toward
Satch.
The disc hits like a throwing star, embedding itself into the side of
Satriani's neck. Blood shoots out, and she drops to the floor with a choked
scream. She twitches for a moment, then lies still.
/storms fury burned out killing time.../
"Next?" says the Man in Black. He bends to pick up his gun, and MIRANDA rushes
him. He turns and swings the butt of the gun toward her, but she ducks under
it, grabbing him in a tackle hug. He stumbles back, dropping the gun, but
recovers quickly. Grabbing her long hair, he jerks her head back viciously;
she loosens her grip on him, yelling in pain.
SIREN leaps forward from a corner and grabs the gun. "I'll save you, roomie!"
she says. "Good thing I've been brushing up on my combat skills."
/who taught the killing game
time's taught the killing game herself
no i taught the killing game first/
The Man in Black turns to face Siren, who is training his own shotgun on him.
He is still holding Miranda's hair; now he pins her arm behind her back, and
holds her between himself and the gun. He backs toward the dais, dragging
Miranda with him roughly. He steps up by the pillar, then turns to look around
at the others.
"This player has an extremely powerful laser. Let's test it." He throws her
to her knees, still holding her hair, and with his other hand reaches down into
the workings of the player. The music skips wildly for a second, then stops,
replaced by the quiet whine of jammed gears. The Man gingerly lifts the Skinny
Puppy CD out of the player, and a beam of bright blue light emerges, shooting
straight up. He pulls Miranda to her feet.
"Don't do it," whispers Siren.
"Give me my gun back," he says, pushing Miranda's head close to the laser.
A few strands of her hair enter the beam and are instantly singed.
"I'll give you the gun..if you let her go," Siren says, voice trembling
slightly.
The Man shrugs. "I can be reasonable. Throw me the gun...and you--" He
points to LOUCH, hiding in a rear corner of the room by a door marked EMERGENCY
EXIT. "Move out of there. I want no one blocking my path to that door."
"It's locked. I tried it," Louch says sullenly.
"Who do you think locked it, and has the key?" the Man in Black snaps. "Move
away." She goes and joins Sylvar and Orpheus. He turns back to Siren. "You,
throw me the gun. Then I'll let her go."
Siren makes no move for a long moment. Finally, she lowers the gun and sends
it sliding across the floor to the foot of the dais.
"Very good," the Man says, crouching to pick up the weapon. "Too bad I lied."
He plunges Miranda's head into the depression from which the laser beam
emanates. There is a hissing noise, and screaming. The others look away in
horror. Then, silence. He lets her body fall to the floor, and hits a button.
The beam cuts off.
"The music has been cut short due to technical difficulties," he says.
Something appears behind him, beyond the wide, front wall of glass. It is the
edge of something immense and round and multicolored, rising from below like a
planet...and then the VVCers recognize it: the Cafe's balloon.
The balloon casts its shadow across the Listening Room, as the top of the Cafe
comes into view. The Man turns to see what looms behind him. As he takes in
the spectacle of the VVC rising, Satriani rolls over, covered with blood, and
begins to crawl toward the dais. The Man in Black, his back to her, steps off
the dais and walks toward the front window, an amused look on his face.
"Forget to tie things down? Or is one of your friends escaping without you?"
Satch crawls up on the dais, past Miranda's body, and slowly pulls herself into
a kneeling position, clutching the pillar. The silver disc is still stuck in
the side of her neck; now she pulls it loose with a gasp, and a fresh stream of
blood begins to flow from the wound. The Man has heard her now, and turns to
look. "Want some more?" he says.
She stabs a button, and the laser flashes on again. The Man is casually
walking toward her now. But with a last convulsive movement, she brings the
disc she is holding into the line of light. She has done it just right: the
beam reflects off the CD right into the Man in Black's face.
He screams, enraged, and turns away, dropping his gun and clutching at his
head. She tracks him with the laser, setting the back of his black robe on
fire. Blindly, he staggers toward one corner of the room. He blunders into
the wall, bellowing like a wounded bull, as the flames engulf him.
Satriani drops the disc, freeing the line of light to shoot up into the
heavens. She breathes a last ragged breath, then sinks down to the dais beside
Miranda, and is still.
The Cafe hovers outside the window, drops back down so that only the upper
floor is visible, and drifts closer. The rear of the building gently bumps
against the Temple of Music. Traveler stands. "Come on...we can jump across
to the rear terrace if we hurry!" He runs to the hole in the window, followed
by Graham, Sylvar, Louch, Cado, Siren, and Orpheus. One by one, they make the
leap to the terrace. Cado is the last to jump; just as he hits the deck, there
is an explosion inside the Listening Room.
They all turn and look back. The Master Player has apparently shorted out, and
the pillar in which it is housed is on fire. The flames are quickly spreading
to the rest of the Listening Room.
"Let's find out who's piloting this thing. We've got to move the balloon away
from that fire immediately!" says Cado, heading for the door to the building.
Before he reaches it, it opens, and ZOROASTER and DARICELL emerge. The private
eye is holding Sylvar's laptop. "Let's see...control-up, control-up,
control-up. That should do it." The VVC begins to drift away from the Temple
of Music. "My compliments on your steering program, Jon. Simple but elegant."
"How did you know--what--why--" Traveler stammers.
"After the rest of you left, I made Zoro a sandwich in the kitchen. I was
walking upstairs to give it to him, when I thought I heard someone opening the
door to the cellar," Daricell says. "We both went down to look."
"I glimpsed a dark figure entering the Temple," Zoroaster says. "And in the
cellar we found the door to the fallout shelter was open. There were
bootprints on the floor. The tread mark was one I know well...one I shall
never forget."
"We knew _he_ was here," Daricell continues. "We tried calling the Temple, but
the comm lines had been cut. We tried the Temple doors, but they'd been barred
from the inside. So we figured out how to gas up the balloon, and came up
after you."
"We're very, very glad to see you," Traveler whispers.
Behind them, the entire upper portion of the Temple is burning. "A funeral
pyre for the Goddesses of Music," Jon says. "They stood against him, and fell
defending us. They bought our lives with theirs, keeping the Man busy till you
arrived."
"And now he's gone," says Graham. "Gone for good. He was set afire by the
laser, and was in the room during the explosion. Who could survive that?"
Cado is at the edge of the terrace, looking over the wall. "I don't see him
inside the Listening Room. Is he still there?"
Trav comes up beside him. "I don't know. I can't see his body in the flames."
The group is silent for a moment. Then Graham speaks. "Come on, let's go
downstairs. I think everyone could use a stiff drink."
And the journey continues...
User: Traveler teaches a first lesson in the killing game
Date: 27-Jan 03:19 PM 822756156
IV.237
wow...i never expected to see you utilizing Skinny Puppy....
User: ecstasy is pleasantly surprised
Date: 28-Jan 06:47 PM 822854878
IV.238
<>
The Virtual Vax Cafe comes down out of the clouds in the evening, over a city
of multicolored lights and flashing signs. "Mediapolis," says CADO. "It's a
crowded place, but I think I see an empty lot down there we can land in."
The VVC descends, past blimps with digital signs, flickering tri-billboards,
and video walls on the sides of tall buildings. The landing site is a vacant
space between two strip malls, on a busy street thronged with cars and people.
"Looks busy," says LOUCH. "What are we going to do here, anyway? Shop?"
"Actually, we've been invited to visit a TV show," TRAVELER says. "Don't
worry, I don't think it's anything like Skippy's...although it is hosted by
Norm[tm]. He's got his own show now. The taping is tomorrow, across town."
Barely has the Cafe been anchored to its new location, when a fat pink man
with a crewcut and clipboard walks in the front door. "Who is the manager of
this unit?" he says disdainfully to Louch.
She directs him to Traveler. "What can I do for you?" the proprietor says.
"I'm from the Mediapolis Zoning Department. I'm afraid we have no record of
your business. When did you open on this location?"
"Well...just now, in fact."
"And you _are_ a certified media outlet?"
"Huh?"
"This is the Retail District. You must therefore be a media retailer of some
sort." He peers around. "Looks more like some sort of restaurant to me."
"Uh, yes," says GRAHAM, stepping forward. "It's the Virtual Vax Cinema and
Cafe. We're starting tonight's Mob Movie Film Fest in just a few minutes, in
fact. Would you care to join us?"
The zoning inspector goes up to look at the Cinema. "Hmm...good, but I'm not
really sure if there's enough media space in this place."
"We've got a roomful of computers downstairs," Jon Vallee says, "offering
access to all the major corporations' online services."
Oh, all right. I suppose I'll give you a retail permit." The inspector fills
out a form, gives Traveler a yellow copy, and leaves.
"Bureacrats," says Jon, aka Number 15. "Same everywhere."
* * * *
The next day, the VVCers set off for Norm[tm]'s studio in the Taco Bus.
**Author's Note: don't ask how they brought it with them this far!** The
chaos of the Retail District passes by outside--bookstores, record stores,
video stores, movie theatres, and appliance stores:
BLOBMONSTER VIDEO
[1mM a l l b o o k s[0m
[7mMediaddiction[0m
[5mSuper 50-Plex Movie Plaza[0m
ELECTRIC BOOGALOO [1mAND MORE![0m
DARICELL and GRAHAM discuss the various products on sale in the store windows.
"Look, Multimedia Boutique is having a sale on 'Newt: The CD-ROM'," Daricell
points out.
"I sort of had my eye on that O.J. Simpson gift set--featuring audio book and
designer fragrance."
"What do you suppose those men and women in suits are doing over there?"
"I don't know...they seem to be talking to the store manager," Graham says.
"Look, the store sign is being changed."
As they watch, MEGATRON MEDIA SYSTEMS becomes UNICORP INFORMATION SERVICES.
"Must have been a merger...or a takeover."
Soon the strip malls and chain stores give way to mirrored skyscrapers. The
men and women in suits are everywhere now, and the buildings bear different
signs and logos:
[1m Grime-Warbler [0m
TURNOVER NETWORKS [7m E T & T [0m
[5m Corporate Cities/XYZ [0m
MacroSoft
"This is the Management District," Cado says, consulting the Atlas. "All
they do here is make deals. And apparently the deal-making has been getting
intense lately, from all the people scurrying around with cellular phones."
"But look, a bunch of suits just came out of that building," says Trav, who is
driving. "They look pretty dejected...and none of them have cellular phones."
"Downsizing, of course," ZOROASTER says.
The Management District quickly becomes monotonous and depressing. But then
they enter the Production District, an area of long, low buildings on fenced
lots. Traveler pulls up at the gate of Norm[tm]'s studio. Here, too, the
sign is being changed, from "The Fong Network" to "POX TV."
"Go ahead in, sir," the guard says. "It's Building H-I. You're expected..."
User: Traveler: Media Replay
Date: 28-Jan 07:43 PM 822858242
IV.239
They park and get off the bus, and a production assistant escorts them through
the back door of a soundstage. They find Norm[tm] waiting for them in a green-
colored room. "What's with the sign out front?" TRAVELER asks.
"Oh, Madame Fong gave me a spinoff deal from 'Late Night with Skippy Podar',"
Norm[tm] says glumly. "But after two weeks, they decided the ratings were too
low, and sold me to Pox TV. Anyway, come with me. You've got to get ready to
go on stage."
"On stage?" SIREN asks. "What kind of show is this, anyway?"
"You'll find out," Norm[tm] says, leading them through a door to stand behind
a large curtain. "I'll see you soon." He closes the door and leaves.
Not a minute later, annoyingly perky theme music starts up, and an announcer
says, "It's time again for your favorite game show...'Staaarrrrrrt the
#Riskybus'! And here's your host, TV's Norm[tm]!"
There is a wash of canned-sounding applause; then Norm[tm] begins speaking.
"Welcome to our show, loyal fans. Now let's meet tonight's teams. On the
right..."
There is the sound of a drumroll, and the curtain in front of the VVCers goes
up. They find themselves standing on one side of a generic game show set,
behind a long desk equipped with buzzers. Norm[tm] is standing behind a
podium in the middle. "It's the Virtual Vax Cafe All-Stars, led by Traveler!"
There is no one in the auditorium's seats, but a technician at the back turns
a knob on his console, and loud clapping floods the room.
"And on the left..." The curtain across from them goes up. "It's the Vax
Unlimited Team, led by LTCOMDATA!" The technician supplies more phony
applause, as the VaxU team steps forward.
"Now, a quick review of the rules here on 'Start the #Riskybus'. Each team
gets a thousand dollars per round. Ten trivia categories appear on the big
screen behind me; when it's a team's turn, they pick a category and bet some of
their money. Answer a question right, you double your money; get it wrong, you
lose it. Or put no money down, and find out how much you win or lose _after_
you answer. Let's begin tonight with Vax Unlimited. Your category, please?"
"Umm...I'll take 'Copyrighted Software' for no money down," LtComData says.
"Why is this not surprising?" SYLVAR says, sotto voce.
"Okay, first question," Norm[tm] says. "Is it legal to download Visual C++
from a public computer lab without paying for it?"
LtComData consults with his teammates, then turns to Norm[tm]. "Uh...yes?"
"Whoa! That's a wrong answer, and it looks like you lose everything! The
first round goes to the VVC team. And VaxU, your penalty will be--"
Norm[tm] stops, his voice drowned out by laughter. The sound technician has
put on a tape of mocking, derisive laughs and turned it up high. "Excuse me,
could you turn that down?" the host says.
"I don't think so," says the technician, standing. It is the Man in Black.
There are screams, as the contestants scramble for the exit doors at the back
of the set--but the doors have been locked. They turn back toward the Man, as
he walks up the aisle and leaps on to the stage. The canned laughter echoes
loudly.
"I'll give out this penalty," the Man in Black says, and pulls a compact
submachine gun from his coat. He steps toward the Vax Unlimited team, and
without another word, opens fire on them. One by one, they fall to the stage,
their blood pooling around them.
"Uh, that was _definitely_ against the rules," Norm[tm] says faintly.
"Rules?" the Man says. "I follow no rules." He turns to Norm[tm] and raises
his gun. Bullets spray forth, shredding Norm[tm]'s body and the panels of the
set behind him.
Meanwhile, ZOROASTER is kneeling at one of the exit doors, attempting to pick
the lock. He succeeds, and throws open the door as the Man in Black is
gleefully engrossed in the slaughter of Norm[tm]. "Come on!" he says, pushing
Traveler, DARICELL and the others through the door, then running after them...
User: Traveler sez, "Ciao, Norm[tm]...it's been virtual..."
Date: 28-Jan 07:52 PM 822858776
IV.240
As they sprint through the back corridors of the soundstage, they hear the
Man in Black shout: "YOU CANNOT ESCAPE ME!" Staccato gunfire rings out, and
bullets whiz by their heads. Then they round a corner, and the exit is in
front of them.
"START THE BUS! YOU SUCK!" yells the Man as they run for their vehicle. In
record time, all of the Cafe crew boards the Taco Bus. TRAVELER guns the
massive engine just as their foe emerges from the building. He wheels around
toward the studio gate, and the Man opens fire again, shattering the bus' side
windows.
Trav barrels right through the gate, splintering the wooden arm and sending
the guard running. The lumbering bus accelerates as they traverse the maze
of the Production District. "Which way do I turn up here?" he yells to CADO.
"Left...then we're in the Management District. Don't worry, I think we've
thrown him off."
"It's not that easy," says Zoroaster. "Look behind us."
Far down the road, a lone figure appears on a motorcycle. As the cycle draws
near, the black coat flapping in the wind betrays the rider's identity.
"We've still got a good lead on him," says LOUCH. "And look...we're going to
make this yellow light, but it'll be red when he reaches it."
"And you think he'll care?" Zoroaster says.
Sure enough, the cyclist runs the red light, causing two cars coming the other
way to swerve and crash into each other. Now the chase has moved into the
Management District; the bus hurtles through the canyons of steel and glass.
"The roads are wide and clear here...that's good for us," Trav says over his
shoulder.
"Yes...but he'll maneuver better in heavy traffic," Jon Vallee says. "That
means we need to get as far ahead as we can before the Retail District."
The Taco Bus' engine is quite powerful, and soon they have gained a lead of
many blocks on the Man in Black. But then the neon clamor of the Retail
District appears in front of them. They are soon caught in congestion, and
their speed is cut in half. "He's gaining!" says SIREN.
"We'll never have time to reach the VVC _and_ gas up the balloon!" GRAHAM says.
"I've got an idea," says Cado. "Syl, come up here a minute." The two of them
confer with Traveler. He listens and nods. Then Cado hands the Atlas to
Sylvar. "Follow this route, and stay ahead of him! It should give me time."
"Gotcha," says Jon. "Good luck."
At the next intersection, the bus slows, and Traveler opens the door. Cado
jumps out, stumbling and then running off down an alley. The bus quickly
accelerates, but must move in and out of cars and people. Behind them,
the Man draws ever nearer.
Traveler throws the vehicle round a corner suddenly, and the passengers grab
for handholds. A moment later, the Man in Black's motorcycle buzzes into view
again. Now he has his gun in one hand, and appears to be loading a fresh clip
into it. "He's got a clean shot--hit the deck!" says Zoroaster.
Bullets pepper the rear of the bus, and the VVCers cover their heads. "Pray
he doesn't hit the gas tank!" says Traveler, chancing a glance backward.
When he turns around again, he sees the light at the next intersection turning
red. A throng of people waits to cross the street. He blasts the horn
repeatedly, and the bus runs the crossing, just missing the pedestrians and an
oncoming car. The Man is not so careful: he sends a woman and two men flying
as his motorcycle careens through. A pickup truck's fender clips his back
wheel and nearly knocks him over, but he recovers, and points his gun back
over his shoulder to fire several bursts at the truck's driver.
"I smell gas," says DARICELL, sniffing. "This is a bad thing..."
"We're almost there!" says Sylvar.
They round another corner, and the bright sphere of the Cafe's balloon is
visible up the street. "Good--Cado made it!" says Trav. "Okay, prepare for
disembarking."
"I don't think we'll have time to make it inside," says Louch. "He's only
half a block behind us!" The Man in Black starts firing again, and the group
once more takes cover, as chips of glass fly around them.
At that moment a delivery truck emerges from an alley in front of the Taco
Bus. Traveler turns hard to avoid it, and the bus nearly tips over. But it
scrapes past the truck with a grating of metal, and all four wheels make
contact with the pavement again. The Man in Black, who has been moving at
great speed, must decelerate sharply. He gets past the truck as well, but then
steers up on to the sidewalk, and crashes through the wide front window of a
video store only a couple doors down from the Cafe.
Trav pulls the bus up close next to the VVC, and slams on the brakes. The
group scrambles off, and enters the building by the Blue Room's side door.
"Cado, get us airborne!" the proprietor yells.
"Aye aye, skipper!" the bouncer says, walking in from the White Room with
laptop in hand. He punches a key, and the building surges into the air.
"Safe again...for now," Siren says...
User: Traveler
Date: 28-Jan 07:53 PM 822858904
IV.241
(Go directly to Board 14, do not pass Go, do not collect $200...)
User: Traveler
Date: 28-Jan 08:06 PM 822859622
IV.242
<>
IV.243
IV.244
<>
"Lovers strut, lovers stroll, lovers leap...
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
GRAHAM and DARICELL were reclining in deck chairs on the sun deck of the VVC,
an open bottle of wine between them. This was no pleasurable afternoon on the
verandah, however; DARICELL's eyes were red-rimmed and suspiciously bright as
she poured another glass.
GRAHAM's mood was no better. She picked up the bottle as soon as DARICELL put
it down and repeated DARICELL's actions of a moment before.
GHOST sat nearby and watched the two women, fascinated. They had been sitting
like that for hours, alternately drinking from the bottle and sighing.
"I'm going to regret this tomorrow," DARICELL said, pondering the consumption
of more inspiration from the half-filled bottle.
"Why are we doing this?" GRAHAM groaned. "I forget."
"Because we know the world is doomed," DARICELL replied melodramatically,
draping one hand across her forehead with a deep, heartfelt sigh. "We both
know that no matter what we do, or how fast the VVC flies, the Man in Black
will get us in the end. I mean, no one can stop him."
GHOST felt it necessary to interject at this point. "Catwoman could."
"Oh, hi, GHOST. Where did you come from? Sorry to disappoint you, but didn't
you see Issue #666 of Batman Comics? It just came out this week. And in it,
the Man in Black kills off Catwoman." GRAHAM told him. "It was gruesome. He
took her latex suit and made it squeeze, tighter and tighter..."
GHOST howled. "No! No! i'm not hearing this... i'm singing a happy song,
tralalalalalala... Catwoman is alive, and she'll come to save us all!
tralalalalalala..."
DARICELL sighed again and poured another glassfull of Dutch courage (even if it
was French, or maybe Californian). "You want some of this, GHOST?"
GHOST ignored her and continued tra-la-ing, so DARICELL drank it herself.
"I just wish it wasn't going to be so soon... or so painful." GRAHAM shivered.
"I mean, I wanted a peaceful death. The eventuality of it never bothered me,
but the idea of pain --"
"I'm with you, sister," DARICELL said with a nod. "I mean, here we are, just
when I have been re-introduced to the entwining arms of my beloved..."
A siren sounded, and a policeman ran forward. "All right, lady, you've just
overstepped the boundaries."
"What? What is it?" DARICELL, rather annoyed, squinted up at the man.
"Mush police. Your statement was too mushy. I'm afraid you must retract it."
GRAHAM laughed as DARICELL sighed. "Skippy, take off that damn costume. These
boards never change, do they?"
Officer Podar grinned at her. "...I couldn't resist. But you really must make
an effort to restrict these PPAs."
"Let me guess," GRAHAM said. "Public Postings of Affection?"
"Exactly right. And you'd better watch your step too, GRAHAM. I've seen some
of *your* antics, and...." Another siren sounded in the distance. "Gotta go.
There's a couple about to...well, mustn't post it on a family board. Bye bye!"
"Ampersand!" DARICELL called after him.
GHOST continued tra-la-la-ing as GRAHAM settled back into her deck chair.
DARICELL stood up, chuckling over Skippy's new job. And that's when she saw
it. The sun was high and hot in the blue sky, casting glittering diamonds
across the blue-green silk of the water. But something moved across it...
"A boat!" DARICELL said, grabbing a telescope from her bag-o-stuff.
"A boat? What is it? Not that Ahannos again..." GRAHAM stood too, and shaded
her eyes to see as DARICELL focused the telescope.
"Nope. It's _Rio_. Wow, to think I finally get to see her after all these
years..." DARICELL breathed a wistful groupiesigh as she stared at the yacht,
manned by the old members of her favorite group. "It's like having a dream
come true..."
GRAHAM plunked back down into her seat. "To think I got up off my nice comfy
deck chair for that."
DARICELL kept her telescope trained on the yacht. "Wait, GRAHAM... something
weird is happening." She was silent for a moment, watching as a trim black
yacht sailed into view and headed straight for the Duran vessel. It was
blaring "Watching the Detectives" (the genuine authentic original Costello
version, not the cover version from Duran^2's _Thank You_).
When GRAHAM heard the music, she rejoined DARICELL. "You don't think it's..."
DARICELL was bouncing up and down. "It is! It is! And he's coming for
revenge!"
The VVC balloon was drifting closer to the two luxury yachts, and DARICELL and
GRAHAM did not need the telescope to see what happened as the black yacht sped
dangerously close across _Rio_'s bow, leaving her bobbing in the waves and
causing Andy Taylor to lose his balance on the deck.
"Let's go. It'll probably be our only chance to ever see him," DARICELL said,
already digging in her bag-o-stuff for the parachute she always carried.
GRAHAM hesitated. She hadn't drunk as much wine as DARICELL. "I don't know.
Don't you think guys will be mad?"
DARICELL grinned as she wriggled into the parachute straps. "ZOROASTER will be
upset if I _don't_ take the chance to meet him. And hell, with the Man in
Black
around to give us an early end...I say carpe diem!"
GHOST looked confused. "Kill the fish?"
GRAHAM decided to go along for the ride. She strapped her own parachute on and
said, "Let's go!"
Together, the two women climbed onto the railing surrounding the deck and...
1... 2... 3.... "Jump!"
GHOST watched in amazement as the two women disappeared from view. "Cool!" He
went to the railing to watch just as the black silk parachutes fluttered open
(leftover fabric from some of the Guilt Addictions stock). DARICELL and GRAHAM
expertly steered themselves to a landing on the deck of the black yacht.
"Wow, that's like being in some sort of Bond fantasy!" DARICELL laughed as she
released herself from the tangle of parachute lines. GRAHAM, too, quickly
divested herself of the parachute, and both went back to find Elvis.
The man was waiting for them, smiling. "To murder my love is a crime... Will
you still love a man out of time?" he said.
"Has he killed Cait?" GRAHAM wondered in a stage whisper to DARICELL, but
DARICELL couldn't answer.
Elvis had pulled the glasses from his face and dropped them to the deck, his
smile suddenly seeming evil, as the women realized that they had been tricked.
"If only I'd been drinking water instead of rose wine," DARICELL said bitterly,
and then grabbed GRAHAM's hand, turned and ran. She knew it was futile, but
there was no reason to make it easy for him, was there?
User: Daricell
Date: 29-Jan 06:35 PM 822940762
IV.245
"he's got a mind like a sewer and a heart like a fridge..."
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
There isn't far to go on a boat, unless you plan to swim. DARICELL prepared to
jump in the water, but GRAHAM held her back. "Look -"
Three sharks circled the boat, waiting for the inevitable. DARICELL backed
away from the edge, involuntarily - and backed into the waiting embrace of
Death.
She twisted and turned, trying to escape his dastardly clutches, but he held
her fast and she was only pressed closer to him, her face in his chest. He
smelled of mould, and the grave, and fresh blood... DARICELL pulled away and
looked up.
The cold glare of his eyes froze her very soul. She wrenched herself away,
desparately aware that he was playing cat and mouse games with her, but willing
to buy every moment of life she could before the inevitable end.
The Man in Black's lips twisted in what would have been a smile. He held
GRAHAM by the wrist, and just as quickly, he gave her arm a swift, brutal
twist. DARICELL could hear the horrible crack as her bones broke over her cry
of pain.
Rage shot through every vein in her body. "You HURT her!" she exclaimed as she
flung herself toward the Man in Black, fists flailing. He bore her attack in
the same way a cruel man would take a yapping puppy, tolerating her for only a
second, before he gave her a blow that sent her flying back on to the deck.
GRAHAM thought she was going to be sick from the pain in her arm, but still she
struggled to gain her freedom. The Man in Black appeared as amused with this
as he had with DARICELL's attempts. He dragged her across the deck by her
broken arm, relishing her suffering.
The sharks circled beneath her as he pulled a knife from his belt and, with the
concentration of an artist at work, sliced her arm with a neat, straight line.
The blood welled and dripped into the water below, sending the sharks into a
frenzy. The Man in Black dipped GRAHAM lower, so that they could slash at her
feet with their sharp teeth, but he raised her again. The kill would be his.
As neatly as a cross-stitcher, he slashed at her with the tip of his knife,
making a pattern around the long wound, every so often punctuating the pattern
with a swift stab at GRAHAM's torso.
DARICELL had not passed out. She crawled to the opening that led belowdecks
and half-fell down the little ladder. She began searching for something,
anything to stop the Man's attack on GRAHAM. She dismissed the candlesticks,
the rope, and the wrench, before selecting the dagger. Running back up to the
deck, she came up behind the Man and plunged the dagger into his back.
He did not make a sound, just turned to face her, and DARICELL could not move.
He dropped GRAHAM's bleeding body onto the deck... she was still alive, but
only just...
He reached back and pulled the dagger from between his ribs without even
flinching, and, armed with the two knives, he came at DARICELL. She began
wondering a thousand things... why she'd never taken tae kwan do, for
example... as he advanced toward her.
The dagger flew from his hand, his blood still on it, and sank into DARICELL's
chest -- but not into her heart. He had aimed carefully, for he wanted no
simple death here. DARICELL staggered backwards, nearly falling into the open
hatch that led below.
There was not much pain. DARICELL was surprised at that -- she's always been a
wimp about pain. But, as the Man in Black followed her halting progress across
the deck of the yacht, she knew the true meaning of terror. Every so often, he
would draw closer; then she would regain a stumbling lead of a few steps.
Finally, she was at the railing, and could go no farther. He drove the knife
into her chest, and this time, it entered her heart. Now the pain came on her
in a blinding rush, and DARICELL screamed in agony as he stabbed her, over and
over again. Then, the world began to fade away, slowly.
There was no emotion in his eyes as he stared at this hapless victim,
considering perhaps another punishment before the finale. DARICELL knew he
would take no pity on her. She tried to stay standing, or at least leaning
against the railing... she would face her fate on her feet.
"Why?"
There was no answer, as he dropped the knife and wrapped his fingers around her
throat and lifted. She dangled, choking in his grasp, until he gave a sudden
hard shake... A moment later, DARICELL's body was lifeless on the deck, as the
Man returned to his other victim.
GRAHAM was not far from death now as it was, with the ragged wounds that
decorated her body, and she could only wonder whether she would die of her own
accord before the Man could find her and subject her to more torture before the
ultimate end.
He found her easily, by following the trail of blood she had left in her
desperate attempt at escape. She had moved belowdecks, and was curled under
the table in the galley -- as far as she could move in her pain. The Man knelt
next to her, face terrifying and leering.
GRAHAM didn't ask whether her torture was partially in payment for TRAVELER's
narrow escapes. She knew that the Man in Black was beyond revenge, beyond
concepts of "payment," and she didn't really want to know what would happen
next...
He dragged her up abovedecks again and pushed her down under a large net of...
something. She looked up, as he released a lever and the net opened. A
cascade
of millions of Elvis Costello CDs showered down, burying her with the sudden
force of their weight, and crushing her bones and internal organs instantly.
The Man in Black pushed the CDs aside to see if they had done their work.
Satisfied that they had, he tossed the bodies of the women overboard to the
waiting sharks before bringing the yacht about and sailing away, following the
shadow cast by the VVC balloon...
User: Daricell -- farewell, MbBs!
Date: 29-Jan 06:41 PM 822940924
IV.246
"This is it," says CADO. "Board Thirteen."
It is night. The Virtual Vax Cafe hovers thousands of feet above a sea of
clouds, lit by a half moon. The air is thin and cold, but Cado, TRAVELER,
ZOROASTER, and SYLVAR are standing outside on the North Terrace. "You've been
through all the others, then?" Zoroaster asks.
"Yes," says Traveler. "Seven, Twelve, One, Four, Nine, Five, Eight, Eleven,
Three, Ten, Two, Fourteen. With this board, our MBBS Farewell Tour is done."
"An ominous number to end with."
"Perhaps. But the journey's been worth it--except for the Man in Black."
"Here's hoping we see no more of him."
"I'm worried about GRAHAM and DARICELL, though," Traveler says, glancing at
the two empty deck chairs sitting nearby on the terrace. "The Man doesn't
seem to be on board the Cafe...but I haven't seen them since this afternoon."
"Let's descend, gentlemen," Jon Vallee says. "I'm decreasing burner levels.
We'll be going down through that cloud layer, and it'll be rather damp, so we
should get inside."
"Yes," Trav says. "I just want to get a last look at the moon. This is
definitely the only way to travel..."
The Cafe staff and patrons are gathered in the White Room, and fires are lit
in both hearths. Large earthenware pots of herbal tea are passed around.
"The last of FIREFLYTE's stock," says Jon, "but I figured she'd approve of
using it on this special occasion."
Now the moonlight through the windows gives way to foggy darkness...they are
in the clouds. No wind is audible outside; the velvet clouds swallow all
sound, except occasional creaks from the building's structure. No one in the
group wants to break the surrounding stillness.
"Have you seen GRAHAM or DARICELL recently?" Traveler asks LOUCH quietly.
"I thought they were upstairs in the Cinema or Guilt Addictions," she replies.
"Hey, Cado, how long till we land?"
"I haven't actually picked a site yet," he says. "I need to talk to SIREN
about that...she knows the neighborhood. I figure I'll wait till we're
through the clouds, so we can see where we are."
A sudden wind rattles the front doors. They burst open, and billows of cold
wet fog pour into the room, dousing the fireplaces. The group jumps up from
their seats. Traveler grabs Zoroaster. "Help me get the doors closed!"
"We'll have to feel our way...it's getting too dense to see." The fog thickens
so quickly, they soon find themselves groping along the floor. "Traveler?"
"Where is everyone?" comes Louch's voice from somewhere.
"I can't see anything," says ECSTASY. Others call out in agreement.
"Just stay where you are!" says Zoroaster. "We don't want anyone stumbling
out the front doors."
"But if you're near a lightswitch, do us a favor and flip it on," Trav says.
The fog seems to keep getting thicker, and colder, and wetter. "This is
crazy!"
"This is the way the world ends," says Zoroaster with a grim chuckle.
As quickly as it came, the fog begins to dissolve, and the VVCers find
themselves standing at the back end of the White Room, with the bar right
behind them. The lights are on, but fog still shrouds the front end of the
room, and the entrance.
"What's going on? Where are all the tables and chairs?" says Cado. "And...
Graham, Daricell...where did you come from?"
GRAHAM looks at DARICELL in surprise. "I thought we were dead."
"Me too," says the Dark Lady.
"Look at the floor...a big checkerboard pattern," says Siren. "And...each of
us is on a square."
"I can't move!" says Ecstasy. "My feet are stuck." The others make the same
discovery.
"We're in opening formation for a human chess game," says Zoroaster, standing
next to her. "You're a rook, I'm a knight, Sylvar's a bishop..."
"I'm queen," says Graham, "Traveler's king, Daricell is the other bishop, Cado
and Louch are the other knight and rook."
"What about me and Orpheus?" says Siren. "Are there only two of us pawns?"
DELIRIUM, VENKMAN, RECYCLER, GHOST, DRAKEHART and PYEWACKET appear instantly,
with surprised looks on their faces. "I guess not," says Siren.
"--the HELL?" says Venkman.
"--the FUCK?" says Drakehart.
"The fish!" says Recycler.
"Uhhhh..." says Ghost.
"Interesting," says Delirium.
"Siren, what's going on?" says Pyewacket.
The fog at the other end of the room begins to roll back, revealing two ranks
of giant black chess pieces arrayed near the front door. They are man-high,
silent and menacing as standing stones.
"I think we're a long way from the Hoggetowne Faire," says Siren.
The black king dissolves into a dark human figure, looking at them from over
the king's pawn. Unsurprisingly, it is the Man in Black.
"This is the last game we play," he says. "Winner takes all. And of course,
I will be the winner."
The row of black pawns melts into a row of large, fierce-looking black dogs.
They begin barking and growling, the noise reverberating through the room at
deafening volume.
"Goodbye," the Man in Black says. Then, "Kill them!"
The black hounds bound forward, teeth bared and dripping with saliva...
User: Traveler
Date: 29-Jan 11:29 PM 822958172
IV.247
The row of human pawns on the white side of the chessboard are unable to move
from their squares as the preternatural dogs leap upon them. Powerful canine
jaws aim unerringly for the tender flesh of necks and faces. The VVC's beloved
DJ Orpheus is killed first, as a dog nearly rips his head off, then crushes his
limbs and ribcage with single bites. Two other dogs make short work of GHOST
and DELIRIUM, raking huge razor-clawed paws across the bodies of their
victims, and shredding flesh to ribbons. SIREN and PYEWACKET are knocked to
the floor by the dogs that leap on them, and their throats are torn out
quickly.
VENKMAN, RECYCLER and DRAKEHART prove more difficult for the demon dogs to
kill. The beast attacking Venk rips chunks of meat out of him again and again,
but is unable to pull him down. Two other dogs, having already killed their
prey, join the struggle. Then Venkman falls, his blood splashing copiously,
and the dogs feast well on him.
The dog set to attack Recycler seems to find his flesh distasteful, but has
managed to knock him down, and finishes him off by tearing his torso open with
its claws, till his guts spill on to the floor. But this dog then turns away,
and joins in devouring Venkman.
Drakehart struggles the most fiercely with the hell-hound attacking him. He
grabs the dog by its throat as it leaps at him, and now man and animal growl
and glare at each other, wrestling to the death. "You little...shit-faced...
son of a...BITCH! I'll tear you apart...you...mother...fucking...MUTT!" The
dog slashes him again and again with its claws, but Drakehart squeezes its neck
ever more tightly with both hands, till its growls become strangled whines and
its eyes bulge.
Convulsively, it kicks at his stomach, tearing a large and bloody wound with
rear claws. He winces and bends forward in pain. The beast wriggles out of
his grip and clamps its teeth on his neck, dragging him to his knees.
Drakehart puts up a weak struggle, but the big animal shakes him roughly again
and again, till his body hangs from its jaws like a large, lifeless doll.
The back row of human chessmen have watched this scene in open-eyed horror,
unable to move from their squares or even turn away due to some immobilizing
force. The pawns killed, the dogs greedily devour large parts of their bodies,
paying no attention to the others forced to watch this grisly spectacle. Soon
the beasts are sluggish and sated from their gory meal. The Man in Black, who
has watched this all with a large and exuberant smile, puts his fingers to his
mouth and gives a piercing whistle.
The dogs raise their bloodstained jaws from the ragged corpses on the floor,
and trot back toward their master in unison, leaving red paw-tracks across the
chessboard. As each animal reaches its home square, it turns and sits calmly
and obediently. Then the dogs melt back into pawns, and the room is still.
"Now for the endgame," says the Man in Black. "I need no help for this." All
the tall black chesspieces around him fade into nothingness. He walks forward,
straight across the board.
User: Traveler
Date: 29-Jan 11:30 PM 822958237
IV.248
The Man in Black stops in front of TRAVELER. "Eeny, meeny, miney, moe..." He
counts to himself, pointing to each member of the group in turn, and ends up
pointing at CADO. "Farewell, brave knight. Your number is up."
Cado suddenly realizes his feet are free. He tries to back away as the Man
approaches, but an invisible wall confines him on three sides of his square.
He leaps forward over Orpheus' body, then hits another barrier, but finds he
can dart sideways one square. "I give you the freedom of the knight--two
steps forward, one sideways," the Man chuckles.
Cado dodges his pursuer in a deadly game of hopscotch. But the Man, moving
unconstrained across the board, tracks him easily. Soon Cado is trapped in a
far corner of the board. The Man in Black opens his coat, and with a swish of
metal draws a long, shining sword from a scabbard at his waist. "Touche!" he
says, and with one skillful stroke, runs Cado through. The VVC's bouncer sinks
to his knees, anguish on his face and a choked cry in his throat. The light
dies from his eyes, and he slides off the swordpoint to the floor.
The Man drops the sword and surveys the seven remaining Cafe denizens. His
gaze settles upon ECSTASY, at one end of the row. "Last call, my good wench,"
he says, striding over to her. "Hurry up, please, it's time."
Ecstasy realizes she can now move forward and backward. She steps over
PYEWACKET's corpse and runs up several squares. The Man changes course toward
her. She feints back and forth, but soon he has her pinned. As he steps
forward, he takes an ordinary red brick out of his coat pocket, and savagely
slams it down on her head. Her skull caves in instantly; she falls to the
floor. He kneels to deal several more crushing blows, making pulp of her face
and brains.
Finished, he stands and picks his next victim: DARICELL. "Et tu, Magistra."
As he advances on her, she discovers that she can traverse the board
diagonally. She jumps over the mess that was Venkman, and zig-zags across the
floor...but of course he catches up, grabbing the collar of her shirt and
dragging her close. A small dagger flashes in his hand, and he draws it
sharply across her neck. He drops her body to the floor, and her blood floods
across the white and black squares.
"Sir ZOROASTER!" he says, tossing the dagger away. "You've eluded me too
long. Now I shall finish a hunt that's lasted a long time. You did well, for
a mortal. I give you the honor of dying at my bare hands...see? No tools to
help me."
The private eye stares impassively at the Man, who advances with the open arms
of a lover. At the last possible moment, Zoroaster takes a large step over
the ruins of DRAKEHART, cuts right, then moves forward two more squares. He
is fast, but moves without panic. "Why run?" the Man in Black says, turning
to follow just as calmly.
"Because I must," Zoroaster hisses.
"And I must hunt...and kill. And so I DO!" He leaps at Zoroaster, black
coattails flying, and seizes the detective's neck. Zoro wrestles against the
iron grip of death, but his arms are quickly and casually dislocated by the
Man; the useless limbs hang twisted at his side. His face darkens to purple
before the Man lets go of his neck. Zoroaster is bent over, sucking wounded,
ragged breaths, when the Man hits him with staccato left-right jabs in the
kidneys. The private eye gurgles in agony.
The Man lands several more blows higher up on Zoroaster's back, his fingers
bent at the second knuckle to give his hands the concentrated destructive
power of thrusting quarterstaves. LOUCH, TRAVELER, GRAHAM and SYLVAR can hear
ribs crack like dry sticks. Blood begins to trickle from Zoroaster's mouth;
then his tortured breathing gives way to wet coughs that send red droplets
spattering across the floor. He drops to his knees, then on to his side.
The Man in Black crouches beside him, then gently rolls him on to his back.
Pain contorts his face, but he can make no sound, as bloody foam oozes from
his mouth and nose. The Man spreads his arms, then slams his open palms
swiftly together against the sides of Zoroaster's head, right over his ears.
The detective's body jolts spasmodically, and his eyes glaze over. The killer
sighs. "Time to die." He chops the side of his hand against his victim's
throat, collapsing the windpipe instantly. Zoroaster moves no more.
Now the Man in Black stands, wiping his blood-smeared hands on his coat.
"The rest of you won't take long." He deliberates, then heads toward Sylvar.
The coffee man trembles before his advance, but does not move...perhaps out
of bravery, perhaps out of terror. "Oh, you're no fun," the Man says,
stepping across GHOST's body, and taking a large, sharpened battle-axe out of
his capacious overgarment. "Off with your head!" One swipe decapitates Jon
Vallee; head and body hit the floor separately.
The axe clatters to the floor, and the Man in Black turns to Graham. "I've
got an offer you can't refuse." Graham ducks, and wades through the remains
of RECYCLER; as queen, she has almost as much freedom of movement about the
board as the Black King. But he does not bother to chase her--he merely pulls
a heavy, lead-colored pistol out, and fires at her head. She falls, and he
walks over, shooting round after round into her exploded skull until the clip
is empty.
"Louch..." He falls upon her quickly, producing a length of piano wire
attached to two wooden handles. She screams, until he easily wraps the
garotte around her neck. She asphyxiates in half a minute.
At last, he turns to Traveler.
"Now our revels all are ended. Look upon my work, and despair. Your Cafe,
and all your friends, are gone to dust and clay. You will join them. But
your death will be far more horrible, far more painful, and far slower than
any you have seen here. I shall peel your skin off with fine-edged razors.
I shall pour acid on every nerve ending. I shall plunge hot pokers into your
eyes. I shall saw off your limbs, six inches at a time. I shall let fire
ants swarm into your bodily orifices while you are still conscious. I shall
give you chlorine gas to breathe, but not enough to kill you immediately...
just enough to start eating away your lungs from the inside. And then I shall
light a large fire in yonder fireplace. I shall impale you and roast you
slowly on a turning spit. And it all begins...right...now..."
The front door flies open again, and thick cascades of fog flood in through
it. In a few seconds, the gore-strewn chessboard and even the advancing Man
are hidden in the grey cloud. Traveler feels as if he is falling...
User: Traveler: End of the Mix (?)
Date: 29-Jan 11:31 PM 822958339
IV.249
The fog swirls and swirls. Then, slowly, it begins to settle. TRAVELER feels
the firm floor under his feet, and the outlines of the room start to appear
through the grey. The chessboard is gone...the furniture is back...and so are
the VVC crew, alive and well!
They all gaze at each other, too surprised to say anything. Then someone
clears their throat. It is a plain-looking, casually dressed, slightly balding
man of around forty, perched on a stool at the bar. "Hi, folks," he says, with
a wide, smug grin. "I bet you're all wondering what's going on."
"You...could say that," SIREN says.
"Let me introduce myself. My name's Brannon Braga, and I've been a producer
and writer for a number of years on the _Star Trek_ TV programs. Maybe you've
heard of me?"
Jon Vallee's brow crinkles. "Heard of you? HEARD of you?? You're Mister
Mindfuck!"
"Heheh. Well, yes, I'm the one that writes all those episodes where awful
things happen, but in the last thirty seconds, everything turns out to be a
dream, hallucination, holodeck fantasy, what have you. Some people think of
these as 'mindfuck' stories, but I prefer to think of them as probing
explorations of the nature of reality and consciousness. It's a form
of...well, a form of 'Out of Context Theatre,' if you will. What better place
to try it out than here on Board Thirteen of MBBS?"
"It's a cheap plot device overused by hack writers like you!" DARICELL says,
gritting her teeth.
"So...that whole chess game was an illusion?" LOUCH says. "Produced by you?"
"I should have known," says ZOROASTER in disgust. "Far too stagey for the Man
in Black."
"Hey, maybe I am a hack," Braga says, shrugging. "But Paramount pays me well.
Actually, we saw your visit to Board Eleven, and heard about the closing of
MBBS. We figured you might be interested in selling the place to us, so we
could develop it into yet another profitable Trek spinoff. This little
slaughterfest was a test story, to see if the concept is marketable. We've had
sample audiences watching the whole thing, in Des Moines, Portland, Santa Fe,
and Buffalo. I think you all did quite well...but we'll be getting the
ratings back soon."
"You arrogant fathead!" says ECSTASY hotly. "That wasn't a fun experience!"
"Yeah...and you made Daricell and I die _twice_," GRAHAM says.
"Oh...we were considering a separate show for you two," says Braga. "Sort of
a beatniks-meet-Baywatch thing, two smart, sexy chicks on the road in America.
Lots of 80s music on the soundtrack, to ride the Gen X-Old Wave nostalgia
trend. We might dump Duran and Costello, though...maybe we'll have your
characters be big fans of Bon Jovi and Expose'."
"We...are...not...for...sale," Traveler says. "Now...get out. GET OUT!!"
Suddenly the Man in Black rises up from behind the bar and grabs Brannon
Braga. The producer screeches, wriggles free, and start running toward the
front of the room. The Man in Black vaults over the bar and pursues him.
Braga backs toward the still-open entrance doors, trapped. The Man pounces on
him, and they begin wrestling. Then Braga stumbles backward, falling through
the front doors, and the Man, holding him close, falls with him. They plummet
into the clouds, their drawn-out screams fading away.
No one speaks for a long moment.
"Do you think we've seen the last of them?" CADO ventures.
"I sure hope so," says Daricell.
"What a night," says Traveler. "Would it bother anyone if we didn't land on
this board? I'd rather stay airborne and avoid more trouble."
There are quick expressions of assent from all the others. "Where will we go,
then, Trav?" Graham inquires.
The proprietor smiles. "I'd kinda like to see our old haunt again before we
leave MBBS for good. What do you all say? A final visit to Board Six?"
"Hear, hear!" says Sylvar. "And then...we sail the open seas of cyberspace."
"All right, then! Cado, plot us a course for home. As the book--and the
movie--say...'First star on the right, and straight on till morning'..."
:)
User: Traveler: Penultimatum
Date: 29-Jan 11:34 PM 822958522
IV.250
fuck me.
that was very well done...and you hit everyone's personality along the way.
User: Ecstasy: Hurry up please, it's time.
Date: 30-Jan 02:15 AM 822968166