The question that I've come up with is one that is puzzling, yet
to the point. Why, when the vampire novels and stories that are
being published now verge on the exceptional, are the movies so
completely awful? I'm talking BAD here. Is Hollywood toying with
the fans of the Horror genre or are they just clueless? With the
recent casting debacle of "Interview with the Vampire"
as an example, the future look rather bleak.
Those of you who have read my book or film reviews probably realize
that I am, on average, easily entertained. Though I may dislike
some thing as a whole, I can always find a small detail or nuance
that is innovative or at least amusing. Recently, this optimistic
attitude has been challenged by some of the worst vampire films
spawned in B movie hell.
It was filmed in London! It stars Julian Sands! Boy is it a stinker!
First and foremost, this film is set in the London that travel
agents have nightmares about. It was atmospheric all right, think
dark and rainy. The plot was rather nonexistent, due to a lack
of dialogue. Brooding looks can only carry a film so far. My advice,
skip it unless you're a die hard Julian Sands fan.
My next Victim is a real turkey titled "Midnight Kiss".
The synopsis didn't sound bad, just mundane. Lady cop takes it
to the edge tracking down a killer vampire. The most amusing scene
featured the vampire (long, blonde hair and the goofiest laugh
this side of Crispen Glover) unzipping his bodybag, in lieu of
a coffin, to shut of the alarm clock. My friend Cat, Queen of
the B-movies, pointed out that the confrontation/fight scene near
the end was hilarious.. Since both combatants have long hair,
there is an enormous amount of brown and blonde locks being flung
about as the two proceed to trash the cop's apartment in an attempt
to destroy one another. It looks pretty silly. If you just can't
resist, watch it and get a few good laughs.
I'm sorry. I am apologizing beforehand because "Dracula Rising"
was really bad. Produced by Horror veteran Roger Corman, this
movie suffers from apocalyptic miscasting. Dracula, the eternal
Vamp man, is played by Christopher Atkins. Filmed on location
in Eastern Europe, the scenery is great and the story mildly interesting.
Riding on the success of "Bram Stoker's Dracula", they've
thrown in a reincarnation subplot, complete with the heroine being
burned at the stake while a young, human Dracula watches helplessly.
The problem is that Mr. Atkins depth of emotion in the tortured
role is limited to a couple of expressions. Namely, Fear, Annoyance
and Aloofness, or any combination of the three. While watching
this piece of work, we labeled the expressions: one, two, three....etc.
Now, you are saying to yourselves, "They can't all
be that bad." And it's true, they're not. To end on a less
depressing note, I must mention "Blood Ties". This vampire
flick was made for cable T.V. and was quite good. I would describe
it as the first politically correct Vampire film. Ooops, in this
film, "Vampire" is a derogatory term, they prefer to
be called "Carpathians". In terms of storyline, they
did something new and it worked. The "Carpathians" have
evolved just like everyone else, only they're still being hunted
by the fanatically religious. It gets interesting when the old
ways clash with the new. There isn't a lot of fangs flashing or
gorging on blood, but when they get pissed of, they have a great
growl.
At any rate, there seems to be a lot of vamp movies, both good
and bad, being released as of late. Check them out and let me
know what you think of them.
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