Ralph Wiggum
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    To all of you who do not know of Ralph Wiggum, I suggest you get to know him.  Ralph is one of the best, if not the best character, on The Simpsons.    With humorous lines such as "Me fail English?  Thats unpossible" and "My doctor said I wouldn't have so many nose bleeds if I kept my finger out of there", Ralph has proven himself as one of the premier characters on the show.  He doesn't get as much air time as Bart or Homer, but he makes the most of what he gets.  Now more on our star:

Wiggumisms:

"...and my doctor said I wouldn't have so many nose bleeds if I kept my finger out of there."

"...and when the doctor said I didn't have worms any more, that was the happiest day of my life."

"Can you open my milk, Mommy?"

"Dear Ms. Hoover. You have lyme's disease. We miss you. Kevin's biting me. Come back soon."

"He's still funny, but not ha-ha funny."

"Hi Lisa -- we're gonna to be in a pie."

"I ate all my caps."

"I beat the smart kids! I beat the smart kids!"

"I bent my Wookie."

"I can't believe I used to go out with you."

"I heard a Frankenstein lives there."

"I heard your dad went into a restaurant and ate everything in the restaurant and they had to close the restaurant."

"I love Lisa Simpson, and when I grow up I'm going to marry her."

"I'm Idaho!"

"I'm pedalling backwards!"

"It says `choo-choo-choose me.' And there's a picture of a train."

"Look in the tunk."

"Me fail English? That's unpossible!"

"Ms. Hoover, I glued my head to my shoulder."

"Ms. Hoover, the floor is shaking."

"My cat's breath smells like cat food."

"My cat's name is Mittens."

"My face is on fire!"

"My parents won't let me use scissors."

"My worm went in my mouth and then I ate it...can I have another one?"

"Oh boy, sleep! That's where I'm a Viking!"

"Principal Skinner, I got carsick in your office."

"Somebody took my juice money!"

"What's a battle?"

"What's a diorama?"

"When I grow up, I'm going to go to Bovine University."

"Will you cook my dinner for me? My parents aren't around and I'm not allowed to turn on the stove."

"You're deceptive."

"I think I wet my bed."

Listen to Ralph:

Pictures of Ralph in All His Glory:

Ralph with a flute up his nose	Ralph being a little "picky"

Ralph bent his wookie	Ralph having a good cry

Ralph dresses up as Idaho	Ralph playing the spoons

Ralph in the intro to "Chief Wiggum P.I."	Ralph yelling at Homer at the Chili Cook-Off

"Will you cook my dinner for me?"	Ralph standing proudly at Nuclear Power Plant contest

Any Ralph related questions or comments?
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Last Updated: 6-26-99