Size matters not...hey, what are you laughing at?
Submitted by: Michael J. Aulfrey (mikeaulf@tartarus.uwa.edu.au)
Lift THAT ship?! You must be out of your f**king mind!
Submitted by: Christopher Wetzler (cwetzler@camelot.bradley.edu)
I cannot teach him. IQ of 30 has he. Hangs upside down in ice
caves.
Submitted by: Michael J. Aulfrey (mikeaulf@tartarus.uwa.edu.au)
Duct Tape...the Force it is like. Both a light side and a dark side it has. Binds the universe together it does!
Get thee your lips off Leia, she's your sister for crying out loud!
Submitted by: Christopher Wetzler (cwetzler@camelot.bradley.edu)
Remember all that stuff Obi-Wan taught you? Forget it.
Submitted by: Christopher Wetzler (cwetzler@camelot.bradley.edu)
Yeah, well oneness with the universe doesn't put food on the plate, junior.
When 900 years old you reach, get as many chicks you will not.
Submitted by: Christopher Wetzler (cwetzler@camelot.bradley.edu)
No...there is another. Let's hope as stupid, she is not.
In that cave is only what you take with you. Hey, get that out of your
hand and put it back in your pants!
Submitted by: Christopher Wetzler (cwetzler@camelot.bradley.edu)
Does your droid like short little hairy green things?
Submitted by: Christopher Wetzler (cwetzler@camelot.bradley.edu)
Never underestimate the powers of the dark side. Or is that Regis
Philbin?
Submitted by: Christopher Wetzler (cwetzler@camelot.bradley.edu)
What the hell am I anyway?
Submitted by: Christopher Wetzler (cwetzler@camelot.bradley.edu)
I cannot teach him. Land an X-wing, he cannot even.
Luke! Get your ass back here before I ram this lightsaber up your
butt!
Submitted by: Christopher Wetzler (cwetzler@camelot.bradley.edu)
Never underestimate the power of the dark side... or duct tape.
Yeah yeah. Force this!
Submitted by: Christopher Wetzler (cwetzler@camelot.bradley.edu)
Well, I TOLD you he'd f**k you up, didn't I?
Submitted by: Michael J. Aulfrey (mikeaulf@tartarus.uwa.edu.au)
Anger, fear, merchandising...the Dark Side are they!
Submitted by: Michael J. Aulfrey (mikeaulf@tartarus.uwa.edu.au)
I didn't want this job! I wanted Marlon Brando's role in 'Apocalypse
Now!'
Submitted by: Michael J. Aulfrey (mikeaulf@tartarus.uwa.edu.au)
No Force? Take this, impudent nonbeliever! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
So how did you like the funhouse in the cave, Luke?
Submitted by: Michael J. Aulfrey (mikeaulf@tartarus.uwa.edu.au)
Quite frankly, Mr. Skywalker, if Obi-Wan wasn't dead, I'd have him
expelled.
Submitted by: Michael J. Aulfrey (mikeaulf@tartarus.uwa.edu.au)
Oh, yes, well if you're going could you take this robe to the cleaners for me? I've been wearing it for over 800 years on this stinkhole and it doesn't... Oh, judge me on my smell, will you?
Well it may be spooky, but it saves cost on burial plots and it beats cremation.
Luke, forget training today.. I think we ought to have a talk. Nobody's taught you the facts of life yet and you're getting to be a big boy...
Luke, don't ask what the Force can do for you.. But what you can do for the Force.
This list compiled from various articles posted to rec.arts.scifi.star-wars.misc in response to the 'Top Ten Things You'll Never Hear Yoda Say' thread.