BONKERS! 1999: The Final Season SEVEN DAYS IN THE VALLEY "DAY 1: DARKWING FOREVER?" Characters (C) WALT DISNEY STUDIOS (save of course Captain Eric Skewer and those that belong to others like WB et al.) Original Story by SUSHIL RUDRANATH FOR PRIVATE USE ONLY, NOT ENDORSED BY DISNEY, DON'T SUE ME, I'M A NICE GUY. (And I stay true to the characters!) DISTRIBUTE FREELY SO LONG AS NO CHANGES ARE MADE AND THIS NOTICE REMAINS INTACT NOTE: This story is set in the sixth(?) season of Bonkers! It, and the six that follow, are closely linked, and mark the arc that will end, at least for me, Bonkers!. This story is a bit less "funny" than I would have liked, but it sets up themes and things for the others (which will be funnier, I swear) to follow. It marks the next giant pratfall downwards in a continuity similar to that of Doctor Who: The New Adventures or Babylon 5. Oh, and Darkwing Duck fans... (I'm one, too, y'know) erm... my apologies. TEASER OVERLAY TITLE: December 24th, 1999 FADE IN FAWN DEER stands in the center of a dark alley filled with steam. PUSH IN on her EYES as they dart back and forth quickly. PULL BACK as she jumps upwards-- just as two THUGS run towards her from screen left and screen right! FAWN kicks them both with her legs as she comes down! The thugs drop, birdies flying over their heads. FAWN lands in front of them, crouched. Standing up, she turns to them and bows. Then she turns to face the screen. FAWN DEER Thank you, Master Willari! Your Deer Kun Doe lessons really paid off! VO: DUCK JONES yells out DUCK JONES Cut! Print it! That's a Wrap, people! PULL BACK to show FAWN, the THUGS and the alley located on a moderate-sized soundstage. DUCK JONES runs onto the set to congratulate FAWN. He shakes her hand. DUCK JONES Fawn! That was great work, kid! As usual, another great commercial from the world's most famous TV spokesmodel! FAWN is embarassed at the attention. FAWN Really, D.J.-- It wasn't anything. I'm just glad for the work. DUCK JONES Will you be joining us for the Christmas Eve Party later tonight? FAWN You bet! I just have to go get Bonkers. You know him-- he's always forgetting things like this. DUCK JONES Well don't take too long, kid. Everybody wants to meet the star of the hour! FAWN nods and heads towards a door marked "EXIT." She EXITS the studio. WIDE ANGLE SHOT of the outside of the studio. The Door opens, spilling light into a dark alleyway much like the one from the commercial. FAWN steps out, a small figure in relation to the alley. It is dark and damp, and puddles of water are everywhere on the ground. PUSH IN to a puddle of water that is moving slowly towards FAWN. It is almost silvery, like the liquid T-1000 from Terminator 2. FAWN is walking down the alleyway, her feet stepping in puddles as she goes. PUSH in on her feet as they splash through puddle after puddle, coming ever closer to the metallic one... FAWN steps in the puddle. It rises up, beginning to cover her leg! PULL BACK as FAWN is surrounded by the metallic water, which swirls around her like a coil, the top of which forms into LIQUIDATOR'S head! LIQUIDATOR Hey Hey Hello, my pretty! FAWN tries to jerk back, but LIQUIDATOR's got her surrounded! PULL BACK to a WIDE ANGLE SHOT. Out of the darkness, NEGADUCK appears, holding something in a piece of cloth. NEGADUCK Well, if it isn't the fabulously famous Fawn Deer-- heartthrob to millions, and prized princess of one Wackytoons studio. NEGADUCK unwraps the cloth, unveiling a glowing toon Eraser. He is careful to hold the Eraser with a bit of the cloth. I've got a Christmas present for you... LIQUIDATOR, like a spring, bounces FAWN closer to Negaduck. He holds the Eraser dangerously close to her face. NEGADUCK Ahh, the sweet scent of vengeance. Five years ago Duck Jones kicked me out of my job, and tonight, I'm gonna repay the favor! First I'll rub out his most famous female star, then the man himself, and then finally his legacy-- the entire studio! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Suddenly, a hissing noise is heard! Purple Smoke fills much of the alley! NEGADUCK turns, brushing Fawn's shoulder with the Eraser! She collapses as LIQUIDATOR uncoils himself and follows Negaduck. Out of the cloud of smoke, we see DARKWING DUCK I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am-- NEGADUCK hurls the Eraser at DARKWING! NEGADUCK --DEAD! The ERASER hits DARKWING, who barely has time to react as he turns into a black and white drawing, then a pencil sketch, and finally nothing as he vanishes. NEGADUCK carefully picks up the ERASER with the cloth. SIRENS can be heard in the background. NEGADUCK Drat! The Cops! Come on, Liquidator! AERIAL SHOT of Negaduck running off, LIQUIDATOR trailing behind as a puddle of water, and Fawn lying in the alley, on her side. There is but a wisp of smoke where Darkwing Duck once stood. The door to Wackytoons studio opens, spilling light onto Fawn. DUCK JONES can be seen sticking his head out of the door and calling for Fawn. RUN OPENING THEME ACT I CUT TO EXT. CITY HALL - DAYTIME MAYOR KANIFKY is standing behind a podium, addressing a large crowd of spectators, many of whom are sobbing, crying, and holding up Darkwing Duck posters. KANIFKY (sobbing) We are all gathered here today to mourn the passing of one of Hollywood's greatest heroes... Darkwing Duck. The crowd wails. Ahem... Once a TV star, then a vigilante, and finally a duly deputized officer of the law, the Dark Warrior against crime will not be forgotten-- The crowd sobs. --as I, Mayor Leonard Kanifky, declare today, December 25th, 1999 to be Darkwing Duck day! The crowd cheers halfheartedly. PULL BACK to reveal all this being shown on a beat-up television set mounted in the side of a support beam in the 34th Precinct. The station is different now than it was 6 years ago. The paint is cracked and peeling everywhere, paperwork is strewn over every desk, and there are far fewer cops around than in the old days. Those who remain wear Navy Blue uniforms with oval silver badges, like the rest of the LAPD. SGT. MIRANDA WRIGHT is watching LT. GRATING as he reacts to KANIFKY'S speech. GRATING (restrained anger) I can't believe somebody took out Darkwing Duck. MIRANDA Nobody knows who did it, Frank. The only witness is still at Von Drake's. GRATING Bobcat there with her? MIRANDA Yup. GRATING Well, you better get down there and see how things are going. Then, you and Bonkers get on this case and GET ME SOME SUSPECTS! MIRANDA On my way! MIRANDA grabs a jacket and heads out. GRATING is watching a retrospective of Darkwing's career on the TV screen. It gets cut off by a commercial for McDuck Enterprises' Wackytoons Studio. DENNIS is walking behind GRATING. GRATING (sotto) Everything wrong with this town started with that studio. DENNIS stops. DENNIS How's that, Lieutenant? GRATING Back in the late eighties, those guys would put out a show and keep it going one, two, maybe even three years at a time. Toons were happy, the public was happy. Then they started cancelling 'em every year, even if the public wanted more. What'd we get from that? Bonkers is a cop. Darkwing Duck a vigilante, Negaduck an arch criminal, and kids who think Schnookums and Meat are all there is to quality entertainment! DENNIS Well, that's one way to look at it, I guess... GRATING points to his lieutenant's stripes. GRATING No, Dennis. That's the ONLY way to look at it. He stares at the screen. GRATING (sotto) Or maybe not... CUT TO AN ABANDONED WAREHOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE NEGADUCK and the other members of the Syndicate- BUSHROOT, LIQUIDATOR, MEGAVOLT and QUACKERJACK are watching the same ad for Wackytoons studio. NEGADUCK (ranting) Everything wrong with this town started with that studio! QUACKERJACK rolls his eyes. MEGAVOLT sticks his finger in a light socket. LIQUIDATOR is pouring himself between two glasses. BUSHROOT, who has the Eraser under a microscope, looks up at NEGADUCK. BUSHROOT Don't you think that you've carried this grudge thing a little too long? NEGADUCK turns and faces BUSHROOT, glaring. His face is beet red. NEGADUCK (ballistic) I *THINK* YOU HAD BETTER FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE ME SOME LIQUID ERASER AND FAST, BROCCOLI-FACE! BUSHROOT I already told you, O Fearless Leader, that we need a powerful supercomputer to deconstruct the sub-molecular formula of the Eraser so that we can reconstitute a-- NEGADUCK FINE, FINE! (calms a bit) So you need a computer. What about the one we stole last week? QUICK CUT TO A HAL 9000 UNIT HAL I'm sorry, Bushroot. I can't let you do that. BUSHROOT is locked outside the warehouse, standing precipitously on a ledge. BUSHROOT Open the Warehouse window, HAL. HAL I'm afraid I can't do that. BUSHROOT (screaming) HAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLL! CUT BACK TO THE WAREHOUSE NEGADUCK So it was a little nuts, so what? QUACKERJACK holds up a tattered MR. BANANNA BRAIN puppet. QUACKERJACK Mr. Bananna Brain still hasn't recovered from that nasty case of explosive decompression, have you, Mr. Bananna Brain? MR. BANANNA BRAIN shakes his head, which plops off shortly thereafter, revealing Quackerjack's hand sticking up through the puppet. QUACKERJACK shrieks and goes after the puppet head. NEGADUCK Alright ALREADY! We'll get another computer! The late, *great* Darkwing Dork had some kinda setup he'd use to stay one step ahead of the lesser criminals (i.e. YOU guys), so that should be our target. LIQUIDATOR pauses in mid pour from one glass to another. He looks like a little tidal wave suspended in midair. He is in front of a window, outside of which can be seen the GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE. LIQUIDATOR But where could his hideout possibly be? NEGADUCK Dunno. We'll have to comb the city, maybe even the state. We'll get right on it as soon as we send Toontown a little message... CUT TO LUDWIG VON DRAKE'S LABORATORY FAWN DEER is lying on a bed, her arm almost faded out where the Eraser had touched her. BONKERS is staring down at her sadly. LUDWIG VON DRAKE is busy mixing up formulas. BONKERS Fawn... can you tell me anything about what happened last night? FAWN (weakly) Negaduck... BONKERS Negaduck's back in town!? VON DRAKE walks over to BONKERS and jabs him in the ribs. VON DRAKE (whispering) Ashk her vat did zis to her. BONKERS She just said 'Negaduck'! VON DRAKE Don't be schilly, boy. Dat vas de whoo, not the vhat! BONKERS Fawn... vhat did zis-- I mean, what did this to you? FAWN E-- BONKERS leans closer. MIRANDA walks in. FAWN Eraser... glowing... FAWN passes out. MIRANDA A glowing Eraser? VON DRAKE Oh boy... zis does not look good. Not good at all, lemmetellya! MIRANDA What do you mean? VON DRAKE rifles through some books in his library. MIRANDA leans over to pick up a strange looking device on a table. VON DRAKE spins around. VON DRAKE Don't touch zat! MIRANDA jerks her hand away. VON DRAKE Dat iz a Time Remote. Very Experimental, und very not finished yet! In ze wrong hands, it could be very dangerous! BONKERS (hopefully) Could we use it to go back in time and save Fawn? VON DRAKE It's not finished yet, bobcat! Besides, it would take me six days to complete dat, and poor Fawn here... BONKERS Poor Fawn WHAT?! VON DRAKE Has only got four days left to live-- BONKERS is crushed. VON DRAKE Unless ve find ze cure first, dat is! BONKERS perks up. MIRANDA The cure for what, though? VON DRAKE Dis. He holds up a picture of a glowing eraser being wielded by a human wearing 50's era clothing. VON DRAKE De guy in ze picture is legendary toon animator Tex Avery. In his hand you see de Eraser, ze only ting other dan dat mythical 'dip' schtuff wat can completely erase a toon, permanently and forever, even. BONKERS And Negaduck's got his hands on it! CUT TO TWO-TONE WORLD TWO-TONE WORLD is a portion of Toontown done soley in black-and white. The toons here are all, for the most part, black and white, and everything here sings or dances, just like in 30's animation. Everything is normal in the streets until a low RUMBLING noise can be heard. LIQUIDATOR arches over Two-Tone World like a Tidal Wave! MEGAVOLT is surfing the wave, using a mechanical arm to wield the Eraser, wiping out everything in sight! The tidal wave CRASHES over Two-Tone World, and dissipates. Nothing is left but a lone granite statue of Steamboat Willie, upon which NEGADUCK scrawls in red, 'NEGADUCK WUZ HERE'. LIQUIDATOR is holding the ERASER with a cloth, and it is obvious the tool is much smaller than before. NEGADUCK That should get their attention. MUHAHAHAHAHAHA! FADE TO BLACK END OF ACT I ACT II FADE IN to a shot of downtown Toontown as seen through a window. We can see THE THREE LITTLE PIGS performing a skit on the sidewalk for change. TOM of Tom and Jerry fame is dropping Anvils on his own head for a few cents. JERRY is deperately trying to hand out business cards to anyone who will take one. PULL BACK A BIT to show MICKEY MOUSE on the other side of the window, obscured in shadow, closing his eyes and lowering his head. As he pulls some curtains closed we CUT TO THE STREET OUTSIDE THE WINDOW, where GOOFY is walking down the street slowly, giving money to every down-and-out toon he sees. He looks across the street at many faded toon mansions, each with their blinds closed, as if trying to block out the problems around them. GOOFY (sotto) Ah dunno wut's happen'd tuh this town... RACK FADE from GOOFY in the distance to BONKERS and MIRANDA, who are moving further up the street. BONKERS is moving slowly, acting really distracted. He sees a billboard with FAWN's picture on it, and he stops, sitting on the edge of the sidewalk. MIRANDA stops and squats down next to him. MIRANDA Bonkers... you can't let yourself be this depressed-- not right now, anyway. BONKERS (sniffling) And why not? My number one sun, my only reason for bein' is laid up in some hospital with only FOUR DAYS TO LIVE! WAHHHHHHHHH! MIRANDA puts a hand on BONKERS' shoulder. MIRANDA There's still hope! Professor Von Drake says he might be able to find a cure in time. Besides, I need you at your toony best if we're ever going to have a shot at stopping Negaduck. BONKERS Negaduck's got the Eraser, Miranda! He could rub me out in a second! A FADED, almost TWO-TONE RABBIT in scuzzy clothing passes by, wearing a sign on his back and front that says "DOOMSDAY NOW" RABBIT Only Six Days to the end of everything... Six days... BONKERS barely pays attention to him. The RABBIT walks off. BONKERS You got that wrong, buddy. It's four days. MIRANDA looks at BONKERS perplexed. She sympathizes with him but needs him on task. She has an idea. MIRANDA Bonkers! Remember that movie you told me about once? 'Pain Wish in New York?' BONKERS Yeah... it was my first acting role. The director hated my voice so much he re-dubbed it. I sounded like I had helium in my lungs! MIRANDA You had to play this guy who turned vigilante to avenge the kidnapping of his canary, remember? BONKERS Yeah... it wasn't a very good plot. Chuck Norris and Charles Bronson just came outta nowhere at the end to save me... MIRANDA The point is... in that movie, you didn't let grief get the better of you... you took action! BONKERS thinks about this for a second. BONKERS Miranda, that was a movie. This is REAL LIFE! WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! MIRANDA has had it. There's a time and place for grief, and this isn't it. She needs BONKERS up to speed. MIRANDA BONKERS! Do you want to be a knight in shining armor for Fawn, or not? BONKERS Of course I do... but... BONKERS sobs. His tears are beginning to flood the street. MIRANDA Then straighten up and fly right, officer! We can't save Fawn if you're here weeping and CAUSING TRAFFIC ACCIDENTS! A car skids on the tear-water in the street and slams into an ICE CREAM CART. BONKERS jumps up, stands upright, and salutes! BONKERS Ma'am yes Ma'am! I will not allow my crippling sense of helpless grief impede this criminal investigation, ma'am! MIRANDA sighs. She stands up, just as two SHORT criminals wearing paper bags over their heads WHIZZ BY on skateboards! One of them GRABS BONKERS' hat! BONKERS HEY! That was my favorite hat! A SIREN pops up out of BONKERS' head! He JUMPS into the banged up ICE CREAM CART, which rolls forward and starts to go DOWNHILL. JITTERS pops up from the front of the cart. BONKERS Hiya, Jitters! JITTERS Oh no. JITTERS leaps from the cart, flying in the path of an ONCOMING TRUCK and SPLATTING ON ITS GRILL! As it drives off, we hear: JITTERS I hate my liiiiiiiiiiiiifffffffffffffffffeeee.... BONKERS' ICE CREAM CART is bounding down the sloping road. He's catching up with the skateboarding CRIMINALS, who are running on the sidewalk. PAN RIGHT to show an almost breathless MIRANDA trying to keep up. As the chase continues, we pass by several famous toons who are doing streetside photo shoots for coloring books and others who are working menial jobs at stores and restaurants all over Toontown. The idea is that everyone who used to be anyone is now basically struggling to make ends meet. BONKERS reaches out with one hand, stretching it out longer and longer in the hopes of grabbing hold of one of the CRIMINALS. He instead catches a LIGHT POLE, and jerks backwards, bringing the ICE CREAM CART around with him! He begins wrapping around the pole until his face is sticking out and the ICE CREAM CART comes rushing in SMASHING IT! MIRANDA, totally out of breath, makes it to BONKERS. The Two Criminals are standing a few yards away, laughing-- until LT. GRATING grabs them both by the neck and lifts them into the air! GRATING BOBCAT! He grabs BONKERS' hat from one of the CRIMINALS. I think this belongs to you. BONKERS, still dizzy, wobbles over to GRATING and takes the hat. BONKERS Thanks, Lieutenant. GRATING nods, and shoves the two CRIMINALS onto the ground. GRATING Now, let's see who you two hoods really are under these *fabulous* disguises. GRATING lifts up the bag, revealing two small kids that look like MICKEY MOUSE! GRATING This cloning thing's gone a bit too far! BONKERS Morty and Ferdie? MIRANDA and GRATING look at each other, mouthing the two names. BONKERS (sternly) Mortimer and Ferdinand Mouse! Tell me what you were doin' out here stealin' other people's hats or I'm gonna tell yer uncle what you've been doin! MORTY Gee, Mr. Bobcat, we're sorry. But our boss told us to steal things for him-- FERDIE --real specific things too. MIRANDA What sorta things? GRATING And who's yer boss? MORTY Stuff like a policeman's hat, a giant candy cane, two pairs of purple boxer shorts and a Santa suit. FERDIE An' the guy who told us to get 'em-- MORTY (eyes wide) Or Else! FERDIE (nodding) Or ELSE, was... CUT TO THE ABANDONED WAREHOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE - DUSK QUACKERJACK (v.o.) NEGADUCK! NEGADUCK comes out of nowhere. He's wearing a fake white beard and has strapped a pillow to his chest. NEGADUCK What? Can't you see I'm getting all jolly for the holiday season?! NEGADUCK places a TOMMY GUN in the pillow. QUACKERJACK Those two mice got all the stuff you wanted! They're bringing it straight to us! NEGADUCK Excellent. CUT TO THE EXT. of the WAREHOUSE. MIRANDA and BONKERS are watching through binoculars as MORTIE and FERDIE enter, carrying a bag with all the items NEGADUCK wanted. BONKERS is agitated. BONKERS Can we bust 'em now, Miranda? Can we, huh huh huh? MIRANDA It'll be easier to get them once they're out in the open, Bonkers. BONKERS But MIRANDA, they've got the Eraser in there! I just know that if we had it, Professor Von Drake could make an antidote for FAWN! BONKERS is bouncing up and down now. MIRANDA BONKERS! Calm DOWN! CUT TO INT. WAREHOUSE LIQUIDATOR is a puddle of metallic water on the floor. Small ripples go through him. PUSH IN as we hear him hear a tinny "BONKERS...DOWN!" LIQUIDATOR Hello, hello, Hello! Limited Time Only! Think you've got unwanted company? Then call Megavolt's High Voltage Pest Detection Service! NEGADUCK nods to MEGAVOLT, who taps his goggles. MEGAVOLT Activating... NIGHT VISION apparatus! FLOODLIGHTS snap on all around the WAREHOUSE! BONKERS and MIRANDA are illuminated plain as day! NEGADUCK You IDIOT! Night Vision lets you see in the DARK! Now they know we know they're out there! MEGAVOLT doesn't get it. NEGADUCK GRABS MORTY AND FERDIE! He walks up to a window and yells out NEGADUCK All right, cops! Make one wrong move and these kiddies get fed to one of Bushroot's more carnivorous plant friends! MIRANDA (yelling) Just let the kids go! NEGADUCK Don't worry! The little tykes and I are just going on a little trip, that's all-- to a place near and dear to everyone's heart these days... WACKYTOONS! And if any of you think about showin' up-- QUACKERJACK bounds in, holding up the ERASER! NEGADUCK Everybody gets RUBBED OUT! QUACKERJACK That doesn't include us, right, boss? NEGADUCK (sotto) Shut up, Quackerjack! QUACKERJACK, BUSHROOT, LIQUIDATOR, MEGAVOLT and NEGADUCK race to the back of the warehouse, and a yellow and black HELICOPTER smashes out of its roof! As BONKERS watches the helicopter depart, MIRANDA runs off, getting in the SQUADCAR (which is a bit more dinged up than we've seen in the past) and pulling it up in front of BONKERS. MIRANDA Come on, Bonkers! BONKERS jumps in the car, and it races towards the horizon, towards the rising skyline of Hollywood. FADE OUT END OF ACT II ACT III CUT IN to the SQUAD CAR screeching to a stop in front of WACKYTOONS STUDIO. The HELICOPTER can be seen smashed into the roof of the studio. There is a mass panic, with toons scrambling to get out of the building. BONKERS and MIRANDA are fighting their way into the building. WACKY WEASEL is pushing past BONKERS and MIRANDA. He stops when he notices which way they are going, and gets in BONKERS' way. WACKY WEASEL Hey, just where do you think you're going, Bonkers? BONKERS We've got to stop Negaduck! WACKY WEASEL It's too late for that, Bobcat! MIRANDA What do you mean? WACKY WEASEL He's already rubbed out D.J.! BONKERS drops to the ground, dumbstruck. BONKERS No more Duck Jones? MIRANDA, realizing that BONKERS is totally out of it, pushes forward and gets into the studio. The Interior of the Studio is similar to that of a high school gymnasium, with bleachers on the left and right, and a massive stage in the front. The whole place is decked out for a Christmas Party. NEGADUCK is on the stage, holding up a terrified LOUIE. He's holding the ERASER, much smaller now, next to LOUIE'S head. NEGADUCK And next up on the Erasing Block, everyone's fave ape, Louie! MIRANDA draws her gun, aiming it at NEGADUCK! MIRANDA Hold it, Negs! Put the Eraser down! NEGADUCK grins. NEGADUCK Why, certainly, Officer WRONG! NEGADUCK throws the Eraser at Miranda! It hits her, and bounces off! LIQUIDATOR bursts forwards and grabs the Eraser before MIRANDA can grab it! NEGADUCK growls. NEGADUCK Why is it that no truly great anti-toon weapon EVER works on the humans!? He sighs. Oh well. Back to more traditional methods. Boys-- GET 'ER! LIQUIDATOR snakes around MIRANDA'S FEET, turning into SOLID CHAINS! She falls forward, inches away from one of BUSHROOT'S carnivorous plants! QUACKERJACK stands above her, holding a dangerous looking pair of CHATTERING TEETH! MEGAVOLT just stands there, crackling electricity and looking bad. MIRANDA BONKERS! HELP! NEGADUCK shakes his head. NEGADUCK Will somebody please make her SHUT UP? CUT TO EXT. WACKYTOONS Most of the fleeing toons are gone, but BONKERS and a few others remain, including GOLIATH and the other Gargoyles, BALOO and SCROOGE McDUCK. One of BONKERS' ears perks up. He hears MIRANDA'S call for help. BONKERS We have to go in there and help Miranda! SCROOGE Aye, laddie-- but how? All me security teams are toons. That blasted Eraser could easily wipe them off the map before they could get within an inch of yer friend! GOLIATH There can be no security without risk, my friends. And these days, there is precious little security. BALOO I say we charge in there an' give 'em what for! GOLIATH Noble sentiments, my friend-- but what we need is a strategy. SCROOGE Here! Where's that toon cop gone off to, then? CUT TO INT. WACKYTOONS. BONKERS is fleeing from LIQUIDATOR and dodging ELECTRIC BOLTS from MEGAVOLT! SWINGING upwards on a string of CHRISTMAS LIGHTS, he gets MEGAVOLT to ZAP LIQUIDATOR! LIQUIDATOR Haha! New IMPROVED Liquidator has no problems with electricity-- in faaaact... Electricity makes LIQUEE HAPEEE! LIQUIDATOR lunges for BONKERS, but the Bobcat manages to bounce off a far wall and swing around in front of NEGADUCK! He lets go off the Christmas lights and falls on top of BUSHROOT! BUSHROOT (gasping) The Eraser! Gimme the ERASER! NEGADUCK frowns and throws it to MEGAVOLT, who catches it with a gloved hand, only to lose the glove and hand! NEGADUCK You idiot! That thing's too hot to handle! MEGAVOLT drops the damaged arm, revealing it as a toon prop. NEGADUCK smirks. The Eraser is right where he wants it-- in front of Bonkers. NEGADUCK I know all about the little condition your frail friend Fawn happens to be suffering from... I'd guess that somewhere in that Eraser there's a cure for it... BONKERS glares at NEGADUCK. LIQUIDATOR and MEGAVOLT are advancing on him from behind. He's still squishing BUSHROOT, who is looking pained. NEGADUCK snaps his fingers. NEGADUCK Back off, boys! LIQUIDATOR and MEGAVOLT look at each other askance. NEGADUCK I know what it's like to lose someone you love, Bobcat... so I'll let you have that there Eraser-- BONKERS looks at NEGADUCK suspiciously. BONKERS What's the catch? NEGADUCK No catch, cop. All you have to do is... *pick it up*. LIQUIDATOR and MEGAVOLT break out in evil laughter. Miranda, who is tied up in the background, realizes what NEGADUCK intends. MIRANDA Bonkers! Don't do it! You know what'll happen to you if you even touch that thing! BONKERS But it's for FAWN... He reaches a hand out towards the Eraser. MIRANDA BONKERS! DON'T! MIRANDA begins struggling with her bonds. As BONKERS' hand gets closer to the Eraser, she gets loose! Grabbing her gun, she appears to be aiming for Bonkers! MIRANDA Bonkers! I can't let you grab that Eraser! LIQUIDATOR moves to attack MIRANDA, but NEGADUCK waves him off. NEGADUCK And what are you going to do about it, officer? BONKERS stops going for the Eraser, and asks the camera, BONKERS Yeah, what? MIRANDA cocks her pistol! NEGADUCK (with mock concern) Are you gonna get between Bonkers and the one thing he needs to save the most special person to him in the whole world? Are you, his loyal partner, really gonna do that? MIRANDA I guess so. Sorry, partner. BONKERS lunges for the ERASER! MIRANDA opens fire! Her bullet hits the Eraser, sending it flying at NEGADUCK! NEGADUCK dodges, grabbing the Eraser with a piece of cloth. He's enraged. BONKERS (sotto) I was so close... NEGADUCK KILL THE HEROES! KILL THEM! LIQUIDATOR rushes forward, but out of nowhere, GOLIATH flies in and tackles him! MEGAVOLT gets an ANVIL dropped on him by BALOO, SCROOGE knocks out QUACKERJACK with his cane, and MIRANDA goes after NEGADUCK! One of QUACKERJACK's chattering teeth leaps up and grabs the end of SCROOGE'S cane, yanking it away! NEGADUCK hurls the ERASER at BALOO, RUBBING OUT his hat! GOLIATH catches the ERASER in one of his wings and drops! MIRANDA turns to help, only to find LIQUIDATOR and the other criminals behind GOLIATH and SCROOGE! LIQUIDATOR is holding the ERASER perilously above SCROOGE'S head! The other GARGOYLES rush in, knocking the ERASER to the center of the room! MIRANDA and BONKERS are on one side of the room. LIQUIDATOR and the other criminals are on the other. GOLIATH, SCROOGE, BALOO and the other GARGOYLES are in between, but further back. NEGADUCK growls. NEGADUCK You've got one more shot at this thing, Bobcat. Don't let HER mess it up. BONKERS looks at MIRANDA, who notices a trickle of water coming closer to the ERASER. She shakes her head. BONKERS I've got to get that Eraser, Miranda! Fawn's life depends on it! MIRANDA Can't you see it's a trap? The trickle of water now surrounds the Eraser, but does not touch it. PAN DOWN through the floor, where we see the water forming a huge mallet. PAN back UP, where BONKERS is again leaping for the Eraser! GOLIATH swoops in, KNOCKING BONKERS out of the way just as the MALLET smashes the floor, sending the ERASER hurling high up into the air! BUSHROOT leaps for it, but is knocked out of the way by NEGADUCK, who grabs it in his cloth-covered hand. BUSHROOT Nuts! NEGADUCK Stop worrying about the Eraser, and pay attention to THEM! NEGADUCK points to the cops. MIRANDA is holding BONKERS back forcibly. He's scrambling to get to the Eraser, almost irrational now. A weakened GOLIATH and the others have formed a semicircular line cutting them off from NEGADUCK and his cronies. GOLIATH You two must go now. We will hold the line until you escape. MIRANDA But-- GOLIATH You must go! NOW! NEGADUCK is approaching the line of Toons, holding the ERASER up menacingly. MIRANDA quickly drags BONKERS out of WACKYTOONS as we hear NEGADUCK'S laughter echo throughout the night. FADE OUT END OF ACT III ACT IV FADE IN TO THE 34th PRECINCT, READY ROOM OFFICER STARK is at the central podium, looking bleary-eyed. He yawns. STARK The Lt. was supposed to be here to give the late-night briefing, but I have no idea where he is. So I get to do it. Lucky me. BONKERS and MIRANDA are the only two police officers in attendance, and they are sitting disturbingly far apart. STARK The only one who got out of Wackytoons intact tonight was Scrooge McDuck, and that was because Negaduck suddenly got all upset and fled. Nobody knows why-- he was this close to rubbin' him out. MIRANDA Not to mention Wackytoons Studio. STARK Exactly. What's more, it seems like they've started hitting every bridge in the state-- it's almost like they're lookin' for something. CUT TO THE GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE - UPPER LEVEL A darkened room bursts into blinding light as a wall panel gives way and the beam from MEGAVOLT'S light bulb illuminates everything. NEGADUCK BINGO, Boys! Megavolt, hit the juice! The room lights up normally, revealing Darkwing Duck's secret hideout. The criminals all enter. NEGADUCK (babytalk) Well, Bushroot, here's your precious liddle compudder! The COMPUTER is a huge unit, with a screen the size of a decent-sized wall. BUSHROOT glares at NEGADUCK, who is holding a VERY small piece of ERASER in a bit of cloth. BUSHROOT I really wish you hadn't wasted all that Eraser rubbing out every Toon you saw! NEGADUCK Oh yeah!? I didn't rub YOU out, now did I? BUSHROOT I doubt there's even enough left there to manage that! NEGADUCK Perhaps you're right. (dangerously) How would you like to go through life minus one HEAD?! BUSHROOT Sorry... O Glorious leader. NEGADUCK So get this thing analyzed. I want a liquid version, PRONTO! BUSHROOT goes for the sample, but NEGADUCK shakes his head. NEGADUCK Where does it go? BUSHROOT is aggravated. BUSHROOT Under the sub-particle analyzer. NEGADUCK looks around at the bewildering array of equipment in the lab. NEGADUCK Which would be *where*, exactly? BUSHROOT absently points to a glowing pedestal. NEGADUCK places the Eraser on it. The COMPUTER begins to whir and click, displaying more and more complicated chemical formulae. NEGADUCK is staring blankly at the screen, getting more and more impatient. Finally, the screen displays a huge, red skull-and-crossbones pattern. NEGADUCK grins. NEGADUCK That's it... AHAHAHAHAHA! CUT TO INT. MAYOR KANIFKY'S HOME, where KANIFKY is sitting up watching a rerun of the LUDICROUSLY LATE SHOW. LUDICROUSLY LATE SHOW We'll be right back after these messages from our sponsor. KANIFKY Oh! Darn it, I so do hate these commericals! I wish someone would... er... do something about them! The TV display flickers. NEGADUCK and crew appear on screen. NEGADUCK We interrupt this commercial to bring you... a ransom demand! KANIFKY That's more like it! (beat) Wait a minute... PUSH IN on the screen. NEGADUCK is holding a generic toon over a huge vat. NEGADUCK If the city of Hollywood doesn't deliver total control of the city to the Synidcate in ONE HOUR, all of Toontown's gonna end up like THIS! NEGADUCK drops the toon into the vat! We hear a fizzle noise, and then nothing. MAYOR KANIFKY picks his phone, putting it to his ear upside down. He quickly corrects for this. KANIFKY Operator? Get me the 34th Precinct... NOW! CUT TO the 34th PRECINCT's aging computer lab. DENNIS and STARK are playing back a copy of NEGADUCK'S rasnsom demand on a computer. BONKERS is barely paying attention, more interested in examining a photo of FAWN he is holding. MIRANDA is paying close attention. DENNIS If we use a little digital magic, *poof*, we can get rid of Negaduck and company, taking them right out of the commercial. MIRANDA If only it was that simple in real life... STARK No kiddin'. But anyhow, we've now got a picture of the room they were standin' in. Does it look at all familar to you? MIRANDA looks at the background, which is Darkwing Duck's secret hideout. MIRANDA Nope. Never seen anything like it before. BONKERS absently looks up. Nonchalantly, he says BONKERS What, you never watched Darkwing Duck? That's his secret hideout. Everybody knows that. MIRANDA turns to face BONKERS. MIRANDA You wouldn't happen to know where this secret hideout is, would you? BONKERS Even if I did, I wouldn't tell you! You'd probably just let them get away with the Eraser again! MIRANDA frowns. MIRANDA Bonkers, you wouldn't have gotten ten feet with that Eraser even if I had let you pick it up! You'd be rubbed out! BONKERS Better to be rubbed out in the line of duty than to let Fawn down! MIRANDA thinks for a few seconds. DENNIS and STARK are making phone calls in the background. MIRANDA Look. Every time we've seen Negaduck or one of the others hold onto that thing, they've had a cloth or some other real-world material protecting their hands. Maybe that's what you need to protect yourself. BONKERS perks up a bit. BONKERS Are you sayin' that if I wore gloves or sumthin', that you'd let me go after the Eraser again? MIRANDA thinks a bit more. MIRANDA I think I'm going to have to say no again, Bonkers. BONKERS looks crushed, but MIRANDA whispers something in his ear, and he brightens considerably. DENNIS gets off the phone. DENNIS I got a lead for you guys. Any of you remember Launchpad McQuack? He used to be Scrooge McDuck's personal pilot until he started working on the Darkwing Duck show. He says he might know where Darkwing's hideout is. MIRANDA Where can we meet him? The sound of a rapidly approaching plane can be heard. MIRANDA looks up at the ceiling and realizes what is about to happen. MIRANDA (yelling) Everybody, SCATTER! A red BIPLANE slams into the computer lab! LAUNCHPAD McQUACK leaps out of the flaming wreckage. LAUNCHPAD (squavely) Nobody worry... He grins. LIGHT glints off his teeth. I'm okay. Unlike the LAUNCHPAD of old, this LAUNCHPAD is an almost debonair sort, having made it big in the film industry. LT. GRATING runs in. He glares at the wreckage. GRATING You idiot! The Helipad is three levels u..u... Launchpad McQuack! GRATING shakes his hand. GRATING You're that guy that does-- LAUNCHPAD All his OWN stunts. Yes, I know. Nice to meet you too, whoever you are. GRATING grins. GRATING Lieutenant Frank Q. Grating, 34th Precinct. Listen, uhh... Mr. McQuack... all of Hollywood's pretty shook up about the loss of Darkwing Duck... LAUNCHPAD's face falls. GRATING eases up a bit. GRATING ...and I think it's important you tell me where his secret hideout is, so we can get to it before the criminals do. BONKERS and MIRANDA look at each other quizzically. BONKERS Umm... Lt.? The criminals ALREADY have it, remember? GRATING starts. GRATING They WHAT?! (beat) Oh... yeah... umm... well, we need to GET IT BACK! So where is it, Mr. McQuack? LAUNCHPAD ponders for a minute. CUT TO EXT. GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE - NIGHT BONKERS and MIRANDA are positioned outside a window looking into Darkwing's old hideout. NEGADUCK and co. are busy preparing a HUGE vat of Liquid Eraser. Below, in the water under the bridge, a small boat can be seen pulling up, too small to be anything important. MIRANDA looks at BONKERS. MIRANDA Go for it, partner. BONKERS nods, and takes off one of his gloves. Out of his hand, toon claws extend (he is a BobCAT, remember?), and he places them against the glass. Turning his hand in a clockwise motion, he cuts through the glass. MIRANDA grabs the piece of glass before it can fall into the hideout, and BONKERS replaces his glove. MIRANDA glares at BONKERS. MIRANDA Remember what I said about going for the Eraser? BONKERS nods. MIRANDA nods back, and drops a small TEAR GAS canister down the hole in the window. The TEAR GAS grenade falls into the VAT of LIQUID ERASER, where it melts! MIRANDA does a take. MIRANDA What the heck? I thought the Eraser couldn't affect real world objects! From down below, LIQUIDATOR shoots forth an ARM of solid water and GRABS BONKERS and MIRANDA, yanking them through the window, which shatters, and they land on the floor in front of the vat! BUSHROOT It would appear that Liquid Eraser is a bit more volatile than solid Eraser... almost like a kind of Molecular Acid... NEGADUCK walks over to MIRANDA, and grabs her by the chin. NEGADUCK Well if it isn't Little Miss Susnshine? Last time my little anti-toon weapon just bounced off you-- He yanks off her badge, and tosses it into the VAT, where it dissolves! NEGADUCK This time... I think things are going to be a little different! He turns to Quackerjack. NEGADUCK Quackerjack! Toss her in! QUACKERJACK advances on MIRANDA! She backs up, but BUSHROOT grabs her! BONKERS runs to help, but NEGADUCK holds the ERASER in front of him! NEGADUCK Uh uh! Bad kitty! BUSHROOT and QUACKERJACK toss MIRANDA up over the VAT! FADE OUT END OF ACT IV ACT V FADE IN MIRANDA is falling towards the VAT! Suddenly, a trail of PURPLE SMOKE blocks out her image! When it clears, she's gone! NEGADUCK looks around confusedly. NEGADUCK Is she dead? Is she dead? QUACKERJACK and MEGAVOLT are looking up, at a ledge near the top of the Command Center. MIRANDA is standing there, next to a wierd-looking DARKWING DUCK! MEGAVOLT / QUACKERJACK I don't think so, boss! DARKWING looks very different. Much thicker, wider. His eyes are covered with glowing red lenses, and he's wearing black gloves and boots, not to mention pants. He is silent. NEGADUCK (shocked, afraid) I- I- I- can't believe this! I rubbed him out! NEGADUCK is in shock. BONKERS sees this, and reaches out for the fragment of ERASER in NEGADUCK'S HAND. MIRANDA sees this and yells out! MIRANDA BONKERS! He GRABS IT! NEGADUCK shifts his gaze to BONKERS. NEGADUCK I hope it was worth it, cop. Your partner wasn't able to save you this time! MUHAHAHAHA! BONKERS looks at his hand, which is holding the ERASER. IT melts AWAY! NEGADUCK AHAHAHAHAHA! BONKERS' HAND melts away to reveal a piece of cloth, under which is his REAL HAND! NEGADUCK What!? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! BUSHROOT leaps out from nowhere, tackling BONKERS, and grabbing the ERASER in a protected hand! NEGADUCK Good work, Bushboy! BUSHROOT runs past a waiting NEGADUCK, and to the door, where SHERE KHAN is standing with some henchmen who are obscured in darkness. He gives it to KHAN. SHERE KHAN Excellent work, Mr. Bushroot. Your diligence will not go unrewarded. NEGADUCK cannot believe what he's seeing. NEGADUCK BUSHROOT!! BUSHROOT and SHERE KHAN leave together. The rest of the SYNDICATE MEMBERS are handily beaten by DARKWING DUCK. NEGADUCK comes eye to eye with DARKWING, who seems to have grown taller, since NEGADUCK is now a good three inches shorter than him. NEGADUCK (terrified) How did you...? DARKWING says nothing, and vanishes in a puff of smoke. BONKERS and MIRANDA surround NEGADUCK. Police Lights can be seen streaming in the windows. MIRANDA What's the antidote for the Eraser!? NEGADUCK There is no antidote! BONKERS You're lying! Darkwing survived! NEGADUCK Don't you understand?! There IS NO ANTIDOTE! I rubbed DARKWING OUT! I rubbed him out! NEGADUCK starts to blither. DENNIS and STARK enter the hideout and take him away. MIRANDA puts a consoling hand on BONKERS' shoulder. MIRANDA Look, partner. We still have three days left, and Darkwing's computer has the Eraser formula in it. I'm sure we can make an antidote from that... The COMPUTER starts to beep. COMPUTER WARNING! LIQUID ERASER FORMULA UNSTABLE! EXPLOSION IMMINENT! WARNING! BONKERS and MIRANDA pull the criminals out of the hideout just as the Liquid Eraser DETONATES! FADE TO BONKERS and MIRANDA walking through the debris of DARKWING's hideout. DENNIS and STARK are packing up what they can in the background. The SUN is slowly rising in the background. MIRANDA Most of the lab's okay, but the computer's totalled, I'm afraid. BONKERS is walking slowly, head down. MIRANDA Cheer up, partner. We know that Shere Khan has the Eraser, and I'm sure we can track him down in time. We've still got three days left, right? Right? BONKERS looks up at MIRANDA sadly. BONKERS Right. MIRANDA Besides, Darkwing survived... I mean, maybe this erasure thing isn't as permanent as it looks! BONKERS perks up, a ray of hope sustaining him. BONKERS You know, maybe you're right! CUT TO A DARKENED ROOM DARKWING DUCK walks slowly across the room, eyes glowing in the darkness. He sits down at a chair, and sighs, beak unmoving. DARKWING raises one arm and looks at his gloved hand. Flexing all four fingers, he nods. Taking another hand, he gets ready to pull off the glove, stopping for a moment to look at the TV. TV ANCHORWOMAN Yet another robbery was foiled tonight by Darkwing Duck. The Dark Warrior against crime has returned to us! His costume may have changed, but he's our hero just the same! RACK FADE from the TV to the GLOVE, which is being removed, revealing a flesh-colored hand with FIVE fingers inside it. THE END But TO BE CONTINUED